I have been thinking about new year’s resolutions today (like many other people). Although I always want to get healthier, get more organized, and become a better human overall, this year I think my focus is going to be more geared toward encouraging others. Specifically, encouraging my husband.

I had an enlightening conversation with my husband today as we came home from seeing my family in Colorado.  We were talking about how much our lives have changed in the last 10 1/2 years since we got married. If you would have told me back then what we would be up to today, I doubt I would believe it. As a 20-something newly-wed, I thought I knew the path my life would take. However, nearly 11 years later, I now know that I really don’t have a clue.  Proverbs 20:24 has it right when it says, “The LORD directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?” I wouldn’t have it any other way, as hard as that is to admit. What struck me about that conversation though, is when he told me something to the extent of how important it is to have someone in your corner. He said that he always knows that no matter what decisions he makes that I will stand behind him. That statement really stuck with me. I realized that there is so much power in our words. That is why my resolution for this year is to simply do a better job of building others up, rather than tearing them down with my words.

So, I would like to challenge you to join me. Maybe it is your husband or wife that needs built up rather than torn down. Or maybe, you find yourself easily criticizing others at work or school. Or possibly you just find yourself looking only at the negative parts of your life and neglect focusing on all the blessings you may have. Whatever it is, make 2018 the best year yet!

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

I have 3 children age 5 and under.   Needless to say, on more days than others I am either completely worn out or simply shaking my head at the rapid rate that they can absolutely destroy a house. Most days, I could quite literally feed an army just from the crumbs on my floor. I am completely in awe of my friends with small children who live in fancy houses with new carpet and furniture and somehow manage to keep them nice. My husband and I moved into the house we are in now about 2 1/2 years ago and made the conscience decision when we moved in the house to keep the old carpet rather than get new. The only reason we made that decision was because of the tornadoes we like to refer to as children. Between spilled juice, bodily fluids, and mud we have not regretted that decision.

Having children is a very interesting thing. When you are first married and get together with your family or friends that have kids, you have all sorts of philosophies and opinions about things. For instance, if their kids are interrupting your conversations or being bratty at a restaurant, you will likely have the conversation on the way home that goes something like this:  “Can you believe how bratty that little boy was? I will tell ya one thing, if I ever have kids they will not act like that in public, they just had no control over him.” Now, fast forward a few years and all the sudden you realize just how wrong you were. Not only are your kids acting up in the restaurant, but when you jump on them and try to stop the issue, they explode in the loudest crying fit you have ever heard. They have such a melt down that you feel the urge to apologize to everyone in the restaurant, then hide out and never take your kids in public again. Life is funny that way. Kids are more unpredictable than you can ever imagine.

So, how exactly do you win when it comes to toddlers. Sadly, in short, you don’t. You will never be able to control every melt down and fit. However, slowly over time you can have small victories that will lead into bigger ones. I love the Amplified version of Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child in the way he should go [teaching him to seek God’s wisdom and will for his abilities and talents], even when he is old he will not depart from it.” When you train an animal it isn’t instant. It takes persistence and practice. It is the same with kids. They will not know how to act in public until they have practice. They won’t learn how to handle their emotions, until we show them over and over and over again.

Today was one of those days that I really need to lean into the wisdom of that verse. It was a day that as soon as a mess was cleaned up, another appeared. The day started with my youngest standing in her crib, while her poopy diaper that she had figured out how to take off laid on the floor.  My middle daughter chose to eat a stack of crackers all at once and created a massive cracker extravaganza on the floor. At one point I was folding laundry in one room and my youngest was dumping out an entire bag of Chex mix in another room. While I cleaned up that mess, that same child found a marker that her older sisters had been asked to put away and decided to draw all over her favorite baby dolls.  Even my almost 6 year old was not innocent, as she continually chooses to drag her favorite blanket (that happens to be a full sized quilt) all through the house, dragging every toy, crumb, and anything else along with it.

After almost 6 years of being a mother, I have slowly started learning to let go. Some days are amazing, some days (like today) I simply must shake my head and just deal with the mess. I definitely about lost my cool on several occasions today, but at the end of the day when my little girls just want a hug and a kiss before they go to bed, I remember how cool being a mom is.  The messes won’t last forever, but the impact I can make on my little girls will. I just pray that despite my impatience and imperfections, that my girls will all grow up to be the women of God that they are called to be.

I love traditions during the holidays. It doesn’t matter if it’s Christmas, Easter, or any other holiday or celebration, it seems like everyone has their own traditions. I know growing up we had a lot of traditions. Some that I have kept as an adult, some I haven’t. One of my favorite things is giving my girls Christmas pajamas that they get to open on Christmas Eve. After opening their jammies and getting them on, in my house we open one more gift filled with goodies and snacks to munch on while we watch a Christmas movie. Finally, after watching our movie, we read the Christmas story from my girls’ picture Bible and talk about the meaning of the holiday, set out cookies and milk, and head to bed.

So many Christians get a little crazy this time of year when it comes to the secular versus the “Christian”. I have heard radio broadcasts and podcast about how we need to not participate in the tradition of Santa or various other things because they take the focus off of the true meaning of Christmas. I would like to politely disagree. Now, don’t get me wrong. I don’t by any means believe that we should become commercial and focus only on greed and gifts, however, I do think that we can see Christ even in the secular.  The most interesting thing about so many of our so-called secular traditions is that they actually have roots in Christianity. Everything from Christmas trees to candy canes to Santa Claus himself have their beginnings either in a Christian tradition or because of the acts of Christians doing their best to serve God in the way they were called.

I think that during this time of the year, as a mother, my favorite thing is the combination of seeing the joy on my kids’ faces as we participate in the different traditions, and the joy of giving them gifts. I really didn’t understand as a kid how fun it is to give gifts to others. The older I get the more I understand Matthew 7:9-11 (NLT) where it says, “You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.”

This got me to thinking about how often I have not been grateful for the gifts in my life.  How many times in our lives have we received a blessing, maybe a new job we had prayed for, healthy children, or simply a roof over our head and food in our belly, and not given thanks for it?  I know, for me at least, it has been far more often than I care to admit.  I sometimes get my feelings hurt when others are ungrateful, how must it grieve God every single day when we don’t even acknowledge the things He has done for us? We are told “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NLT).

    God is a wonderful gift giver, although, unlike us as parents sometimes, he gives us exactly what we need and not always what we want.  He is patient with us when we unwrap the gift to simply utter an insincere “thanks”.  He knows how even though it may not look like it, the lost job, missed promotion, or unfulfilled dream, are simply stepping stones to get us to where we are called to be. I hope that this Christmas you will keep your eyes on Christ in the middle of any tradition you may be celebrating. Also remember to always be thankful, no matter what your circumstances may be this holiday season.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from my family to yours!

      I absolutely love Christmas time.  I love all of the traditions and anticipation in the air.  I love watching my girls get excited about everything from putting up our Christmas tree and decorating, to making Christmas treats, to being a part of our church’s Christmas program.  To me, Christmas is so much more fun as a mom because I love seeing my girls light up about everything.  I am not one of those Christians who thinks everything secular at Christmas time is bad.  Rather, I am trying to teach my kids why we give gifts, why there is a star at the top of the tree, and the real reason behind the season.  Our society has taken a Christian holy-day and turned it commercial, but there are so many wonderful things to teach our kids even in the commercial parts of Christmas.  I do find it intriguing how many non-Christians celebrate, and I welcome it.  Even if they don’t know the actual reason why we use a tree to decorate, or what the meaning behind candy canes and wreaths are (which ironically all have Christian roots) I pray that their hearts would be open during this time to feel God’s love for him and understand that they have been given the greatest gift, Jesus, whether they believe in Him or not at this point.

                One of the newest traditions of Christmas has become the elf on a shelf phenomenon, boy how I wish I had come up with that.  We have an elf that my 5-year-old creatively named Elfie when she was 2.  It is kind of a silly idea but it is so sweet how excited she gets when she finds that elf each day.  I started thinking about how blessed children are with their childlike faith.  I don’t know a little girl who doesn’t just live in an imaginary world.  My girls are always playing mommy or teacher or pretending to be a princess.  My favorite thing to watch is how pure their faith in God is.  When my oldest wakes up from a bad dream, the first thing she asks me to do is say a prayer for her.  When I put my 3-year-old to bed right now I can’t just pray for her, she has to join in and say a prayer too for good dreams and a good night sleep.

                I think that’s why Jesus had a special place for children in his heart.  He healed many children and, unlike most men in that day, never sent kids away when they came to him.  Instead he drew them closer.  I love The Message translation of Matthew 18:2-7.  The “mature” men of God, the disciples, were inquiring of Jesus who ranked highest in the Kingdom of God.  In my opinion, they were fishing to find out which of them was Jesus’ favorite. I love how he responded to them.  “For an answer Jesus called over a child, whom he stood in the middle of the room, and said, ‘I’m telling you, once and for all, that unless you return to square one and start over like children, you’re not even going to get a look at the kingdom, let alone get in. Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, like this child, will rank high in God’s kingdom. What’s more, when you receive the childlike on my account, it’s the same as receiving me. But if you give them a hard time, bullying or taking advantage of their simple trust, you’ll soon wish you hadn’t. You’d be better off dropped in the middle of the lake with a millstone around your neck. Doom to the world for giving these God-believing children a hard time! Hard times are inevitable, but you don’t have to make it worse—and it’s doomsday to you if you do.’”  

                I truly believe that as adults sometime we do ourselves a disservice.  Rather than simply knowing and trusting that God has our best interests at heart, we over-analyze every single time we are in a trial, and often lose our faith.  We think there is some magic formula to pleasing God and getting our prayers answered.  However, he simply wants us to humble ourselves and have simple trust, like a child.

                The older I get and the longer that I am a Christian, I am so amazed at how much I realize I don’t know.  Over the last several months I have come across so many things in scripture that I never even knew were there.  I have been a Christian as long as I can remember, and it humbles me every single time I find something new in a book I thought I knew everything about already.  I’ve decided that rather than going through life trying to understand every little thing, I want to be more like my little girls looking for that elf.  I want to wake up each day with anticipation, excited to see where God is going to show up today.  I want to go back to the simple and elemental things and have a simple trust like a child.