fear

What’s is that in your hand?

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The world has gone absolutely mad lately. I have gotten to the point where I don’t even feel like I can have the news on when my girls are in the room because of the mass shootings, riots, gender issues, abortion talk, and everything else that I really don’t feel that they need to be exposed to just yet. It’s heartbreaking to see how much the world has changed just since 2020. Not only is the evil in this world reaching an exponential level, but the amount of depression, anxiety, and general unhappiness of people seems to also be increasing.

Technology has made things so much easier, however, the easier life seems to get, the less fulfilled people seem to be. This is blaringly evident as a public school teacher. I see each year the damage social media does to kids. The comparison mentality, the need to fit in, the absolute desire for something to go “viral”, and the willingness to do just about anything to be a part of the crowd. Now, all of these things (minus the going viral thing) have always existed among humanity, but until recent years, the ability to see other people parade the best parts of their lives 24/7 has not always existed. Sadly, the need to compare ourselves to others tends to keep so many people from fulfilling their God-given calling, in my opinion anyways. If you are chasing a dollar or chasing likes and fame, you may be missing out on the hidden place God may want you to be.

It struck me the other day how often God met with people in the middle of nowhere all throughout scripture. As a matter of fact, I have yet to find the verse stating that we have to be inside a church building to hear from God. Abraham was in his tent when God told him to step outside and look at the stars before promising him descendants (see Genesis 15:5), Jesus was led into the wilderness by the Holy Spirit (see Matthew 4:1), Hagar met with an angel of the Lord in the desert (see Genesis16:7), Elijah was in a cave hiding when God sought him out (see 1 Kings 19), and Moses was spoken to out of a burning bush in the middle of nowhere when he was tending sheep. As far as I can tell, God likes to meet with us in the places where there are no distractions. That isn’t to say He can’t speak to us in the middle of a crowd, He definitely can, but there are some really tremendous encounters that we may be missing out on if we always allow ourselves to be distracted.

I love what God does with Moses in Exodus 4. At this point, God has told him that he will go back to Egypt to set free the Israelites. Moses proceeds to argue with God about how he is not the right man for the job and God does something incredible. He says to Moses starting in verse 2, “What is that in your hand?”, referring to his shepherd’s staff. He used the very tools of the trade for Moses to perform a miracle (hint: it turns into a snake). I think that little story is maybe something cute that we have colored a picture of or saw it flannel graphed in children’s church, but maybe we are missing a little something from the story. Moses wasn’t a preacher, he was a shepherd (also a murderous fugitive if you recall). God doesn’t require all of us to go to seminary to do great things for Him. He will use the tools of our trade, just like the staff of Moses, to accomplish His will. As a teacher, I try to keep this in mind. It doesn’t matter if I am not teaching Biblical studies, He can use a math or science lesson or simply a conversation with a student to speak His truths. The same is true of any job. Maybe you feeling alone in your job or position, is exactly the wilderness that God needs to have you in so that he can reveal His truths to you.

So, let me ask you the same question God asked Moses, “What is that in your hand?”

Maybe an even more important follow-up question: What will you use it for?

What the Enemy Meant for Evil

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There is a song by Elevation Worship that has been a go-to for me for the last few months. It is called See a Victory (you can listen here). It is based on 1 Corinthians 15:57 “But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” The first verse says “The weapon may be formed, but it won’t prosper. When the darkness falls, it won’t prevail. ‘Cause the God I serve knows only how to triumph. My God will never fail.” The bridge goes on to say “You take what the enemy meant for evil, and turn it for good”.

I absolutely love that!

I don’t know of anyone who hasn’t felt the attack of the enemy from time to time. Sometimes the attack is in overt ways, other times those attacks come out of the blue. They can be from perfect strangers, or people you trust the most. It always hurts the most when it comes from someone you know and trust. However, we live in a fallen world, sometimes the enemy even uses people we love to hurt us. Sadly no one is immune from the attacks of the enemy, and he always seems to strike where we are weak or vulnerable.

However, we can take heart, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” Romans 8:28. I can attest to the truth of that through some of what I have experienced. Closed doors always lead to new, open doors. But when you are in the heart of the battle, that is a tough truth to hold onto. I know that I often find myself pulled into discouragement, fear, or even depression when I am still going through the “thing” even if I know that God will work it out for good. Like the song says, You take what the enemy meant for evil, and turn it for good. I believe that, but Lord, I need help with my unbelief. Take what the enemy meant for evil, and turn it for good for all those who need a victory!

Following Donkeys

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I have mentioned before in several of my blogs about my love for a lot of the Old Testament stories. David and Goliath, Jonah and the big fish, Moses and the Israelites, and Joseph, just to name a few. What I love even more is re-reading them as an adult and seeing some of the layers that I never saw as a child. That is the incredible thing about scripture, it is layers deep and miles wide. It isn’t just some dusty old book of history. It is truly alive and well and meant for us to get something new from every single day.

Recently, I was reading the story of Saul being anointed as king and I was struck by his humble beginnings. Starting in 1 Samuel 9, we read of a handsome and apparently tall young Saul who was simply sent on an errand with a servant to find his father’s lost donkeys. That journey ended up lasting 3 days and took him right to where God wanted him to be.

That’s how God often works. He doesn’t always take our life’s paths straight from A to B, no, sometimes we end up at Q before we finally circle back and hit B. He also often uses our daily mundane, even frustrating, tasks to accomplish His plans for us. I am sure Saul was a little annoyed and verse 5 even tells us that he even tried to convince his servant to turn back. However, the servant said that they ought to press a little further and inquire of the man of God in the town they had reached. That man of God just so happened to be the prophet Samuel, and he already knew Saul was coming. “Now the day before Saul came, the Lord had revealed this to Samuel: ‘About this time tomorrow I will send you a man from the land of Benjamin. Anoint him ruler over my people Israel; he will deliver them from the hand of the Philistines. I have looked on my people, for their cry has reached me.’ When Samuel caught sight of Saul, the Lord said to him, ‘This is the man I spoke to you about; he will govern my people.’” 1 Samuel 9:15-17 NIV.

God used the mundane daily grind to lead Saul exactly where he needed to be. Maybe He is doing the same for us? Could those daily inconveniences and frustrations be guiding us down the very path that God has for us? Maybe those annoying donkeys are actually guiding us straight toward our anointing. The question is, will you keep going like the servant wanted to, or will you turn back and quit the way that Saul wanted to? What I love about this story is that God place that unnamed servant with Saul to encourage him when he was about to give up. We all need that from time to time. That encouragement was the very thing that led them to the anointing. Let us be like that servant to each other. Encourage each other through the long, hard journey, maybe that breakthrough is right around the corner!

Focus on the Narrow Road

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If you have been a Christian for any amount of time, you know that praying isn’t always an easy thing to do. Oh, don’t get me wrong. There are times when life is going good that we can tend to get over confident in our own abilities. Our prayers can become hollow and really we start to trust in ourselves more than God. Check that box, I know I am guilty of that from time to time. However, when we deal with hard things, that often drives us into a more genuine prayer life.

Unfortunately, no matter what translation of the Bible you look at, there is never a place where it says “Follow me, this path is easy”. Instead, it says, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” Matthew 7:13-14 NIV.

Narrow Road - North Maui Photograph by Amy Fose

Well, that’s encouraging.

Have you ever travelled on a narrow road? I know that I have. When you travel on a narrow road you have to take your time. It isn’t a freeway where you can set the cruise control and go without having to make a whole lot of adjustments. If that narrow road happens to be in rough terrain, you have to really slow down. You may even have to pull over and watch someone else pass you by from time to time. You can’t proceed faster than you are able, or you will likely wreck.

Our spiritual journey is like that. Sometimes we are able to roll very smoothly at a good pace. Other times, we take a hairpin turn and feel like we are headed in the exact wrong direction. That is when our prayer life needs to really kick in. So why not look at the model prayer for a little advice? I am referring to the Lord’s prayer that millions around the world have memorized and repeat often (See Matthew 6). However, there are a few key things in that prayer that should cause us to pause a little bit.

First it says to “give us this day our daily bread”. That is something that we as Americans struggle with big time, meaning I struggle with it big time. For proof of that look no further than the toilet paper extravaganza of 2020. We can’t even trust that we will have enough toilet paper without hoarding it, how are we ever going to trust God daily for something as basic as what we eat. That’s hard for me. I struggle when we get close to the end of the month and the cabinets start looking bare before I get to the store (I am a nerd who prefers to only shop once a month if possible). But we are not called to trust God for our monthly or weekly grocery trip, we are called to trust Him daily for our most basic necessities.

The second thing that can be tough in that prayer is where Jesus goes on to say “forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors”. That is scary. Some translations say forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us. That’s terrifying. I don’t want to be forgiven in the way I forgive people sometimes. That should make us pause and think about who we may be holding unforgiveness toward. Jesus even goes on to say that if we forgive others, God will forgive us. But, if we don’t forgive others, God will also not forgive us.

Despite those challenging topics though, Jesus tells us that when we pray God already knows our needs. He does care about us, but he cares about us growing and becoming more Christ-like in the process. Jesus never once promises that He will always say yes to our requests. After all, also in the Lord’s prayer, it also says “may YOUR will be done” (emphasis mine). Believe it or not, our will is not always the same as God’s will. My prayer is that as I grow in my faith, my will will be in line with that of the Father’s. However, sometimes that is hard when we just don’t understand.

This year has been a year full of disappointments, frustrations, and loss. I find myself sometimes wavering in my own faith when things get tough, or when I feel like my prayers are not being answered. But I hold onto what God told Job when he felt the same way: “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me, if you know so much.” Job 38:4 NLT.

Wow….that puts things in perspective. If God created the heavens and the earth and keeps the sun rising and setting every single day, I know that he is in control. We must reach a point where we can trust in that, no matter what the world looks like around us.

Impulsive Faith

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I am a chronic over-analyzer. I tend to absolutely overthink everything. I would not refer to myself as a perfectionist by any stretch of the imagination (if you want confirmation of that, just check out my lack of organizational skills), however, when I do something I want to do it well and feel like I owe it to myself and anyone else involved to do the best I possibly can. That tends to cause me a lot of lost sleep as I run through scenarios and conversations that have not even happened in the middle of the night. That quality also makes it difficult to take a step or a leap of faith when I feel called to do something. Rather than thinking about the possibilities of success if I take the step, I tend to think of what kind of ways I could fail.

Sadly, that way of thinking is the polar opposite of how we are supposed to really live out our faith. I don’t recall reading a story in the Bible where the characters had to “think and pray” about anything. They just did what they felt called to. Whether it was Rahab risking her life to protect the Hebrew spies (see Joshua 2), Noah building an Ark when he had never even seen rain (see Genesis 5), or my personal favorite, Peter stepping out of the boat (see Matthew 14), all of these giants of the faith took steps of faith, without hesitation.

News · Why did Jesus walk on water? · United Methodist Men

I especially love Peter, mostly because of his impulsive faith. Sometimes he gets a bad rap because he is impulsive. However, I have a different perspective. I think he is a giant in the area of faith. The man stepped out of a boat, during a storm!!! Who thinks that way? If you look at the story of Peter walking on water as a whole, the rest of the apostles reacted the way a lot of us would. They were fearful. They thought Jesus was a ghost. They had analysis paralysis and likely thought Peter was insane when he called out to Jesus and stepped out of the boat. The funny thing is though, that their hesitation made them miss out on another miracle (by the way, this happened right after Jesus miraculously fed a multitude).

I don’t want to do that. I don’t want to miss out on the miraculous things God has planned for me, because of fear of failure. Or worse yet, I don’t want to let the fear of what others may or may not think of me stop me from stepping out in faith. I lived the first 2/3 of my life missing out on things because I was trying to please others or look a certain way. Whether it was trying to please my parents, teachers or friends, or trying to portray myself as a perfect little Christian, I let those things keep me from taking any bold steps outside of what was “pleasing to man”. I don’t want to live that way. I want to be more like Peter and take bold steps of faith.

“For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10 ESV

It is very hard to not want to please, or for some try to impress, those around us. We all want to feel like we belong and are accepted. What isn’t okay, is sacrificing our calling and our faith in order to be a part of that “in-crowd”. My prayer for all of us is that we would shed a little of that cautious nature, and start having a more impulsive faith like that of Peter, Ruth, Paul, Rahab, and countless others. When I leave this world, I want it to be said of me that I wasn’t afraid to take a step, or leap, of faith.

Leap Of Faith Pictures, Photos, and Images for Facebook, Tumblr ...

Tough Days

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Frazzled Mom Cartoon Clipart | Tired mom, Frazzled mom, Busy mom

We are living in a very strange time right now. I have to admit, I am a little bit of a hermit in my normal life (as much as is possible as a public school teacher surrounded by people all day). I cherish the moments I get alone with no one demanding of me, whether it is a high schooler needing help on a math problem, or my own 3 children. However, this is different. This “social distancing” isolation thing is not the same as me shutting my classroom door during the lunch period to get work done and have a few moments alone to listen to my podcasts. No, this world that we are in proves what God himself said in the very beginning, “It is not good (beneficial) for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper [one who balances him- a counterpart who is] suitable and complementary for him.” Genesis 2:18 AMP

As humans, we need each other. We thrive when we are together and able to interact. On the other hand, when we are alone we tend to struggle. That is when depression and discouragement take hold. We need others to build us up.

Today was one of those tough days for me. I am fortunately not alone in my “social distancing”, I have my husband and 3 girls who keep me on my toes. However, I do miss the “outside” world. I miss my rare date nights going out with my husband. I miss having coworkers to talk to and joke around with without staring at a computer screen to do it. I miss going to the grocery store without feeling like you are in a war zone because everyone around you is wearing masks.

Today was one of those days where I looked around the house that I have cleaned 3 or 4 times already this week that looks like an explosion of crumbs, toys, shoes, and dirty laundry…again. It was a day that I have already done two loads of dishes, and probably need to do another. Today was a day where I should have been at church hugging friends and instead, I was stuck in the messy house staring at a screen pretending like it is the same thing. We all know it isn’t.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am so thankful for the technology we do have to be able to interact virtually. As a matter of fact, I have loved getting to “attend” other churches in neighboring towns because of the fact that everyone is now live streaming their services. I have really enjoyed that. I also appreciate that I have the means to text or call someone. But like I said, it’s not the same.

So what’s the solution?

I have no idea. To be honest with you, I am only writing this because I felt like I am probably not the only one feeling the same way. I think that we all now realize how much we have taken human interaction for granted. I never valued the interruptions I had when I was trying to get work done at school like I do now. I also never valued how good it felt to go to a grocery store or restaurant without feeling like I may just be swimming in a sea of germs (even though we always have been, just never thought about it).

If nothing else, I hope that we all come out of this appreciating each other a little bit more. I know that even though my kiddos are messy, I do appreciate the fact that I get to experience more little moments with them, like today when my sweet 4 year old finally mastered pedalling a bike. I have also loved seeing them learn more about reptiles because of the lizard, horny toad, and frogs they have found while playing outside. There are definitely blessings coming out of this pandemic.

My prayer right now is for every lonely person whether they are surrounded by family or don’t have anyone else around. I pray for the depressed and the discouraged. Know that even in your loneliest moment, God is there.

“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39

Giveaway Time!

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wilderness

During the last financial crisis, in 2009, I was laid off from my job. It was a scary time for me and my husband. It’s hard to explain the emotions you go through.

Now we are in a whole new era with a different kind of crisis. So many have once again been laid off or furloughed from their jobs. There is a lot of uncertainty. Because of that, I want to give away 5 copies of the book I wrote born out of my own time of crisis, Finding God in the Wilderness: Learning to Trust God During Times of Uncertainty.

Entering is easy, simply comment on this post for yourself or tell me about a friend who you would like to enter (you can definitely do both). Please share this post on your social media as well!.

I will pick 5 winners on my wedding anniversary, April 28th.

If you just can’t wait until then, you can order a copy here.

 

A Matter of Trust

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The world has gone mad. I have go to be honest, what’s going on before our very eyes feels slightly like the vibe before Y2K mixed with the market crash in 2008…only amplified. Fear has taken hold and the world has gone a bit off the rails. Honestly, it kind of breaks my heart to see how quickly people have become selfish and panicked.

Is selfishness a sin?

No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.

1 Corinthians 10:24 NIV

I was thinking about how many things we take for granted today, and it really humbled me. People are buying every item off a grocery store shelf, when just 2 weeks ago we took for granted how easy it was to get practically anything you wanted or needed at a big box store, or even with the click of a button on your phone app. Now the one item we probably all took for granted the most, toilet paper, has disappeared off the shelves and people have turned into hoarders overnight. I think it would be a great idea to take a deep breath and just think through all the things that we enjoy in this country. Is it inconvenient, absolutely. The uncertainty of what is to come over the next few days, weeks, and months can be a little unnerving if you sit and think about it too much.

One of my favorite verses during stressful times is Matthew 6:25-27 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?”

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These birds don’t worry about a thing

I love the thought of that. Birds don’t worry, they just live one day at a time.

At our house we have quite a few animals running around. I can attest to the fact that they don’t worry about their future. They focus on right now. Their mode of operation never includes fretting about the upcoming winter or having the latest in ear tag fashion. No, instead they are focused on right now. I think we could learn a lot about a better way to live by observing the creatures around us. Prepare for the seasons ahead of us, but don’t fret about them.

With all this panic about a new virus floating around, and the massive damage it is doing to our economy, it is so easy to get pulled into fear and dread about the future. However, we have to remember: through it all God is still in control. I love the childlike faith of my girls. They don’t panic about the future. They dream of what could be. They talk about how they want to be teachers, singers, or doctors. They play pretend and have no fear of what is going on. They know that their mom and dad are going to take care of them, so they don’t have to worry. We need to be more like that. If God can create us out of nothing and uniquely gift each and every one of us, then nothing is too big for him, not even this virus.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT