God

Tough Days

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Frazzled Mom Cartoon Clipart | Tired mom, Frazzled mom, Busy mom

We are living in a very strange time right now. I have to admit, I am a little bit of a hermit in my normal life (as much as is possible as a public school teacher surrounded by people all day). I cherish the moments I get alone with no one demanding of me, whether it is a high schooler needing help on a math problem, or my own 3 children. However, this is different. This “social distancing” isolation thing is not the same as me shutting my classroom door during the lunch period to get work done and have a few moments alone to listen to my podcasts. No, this world that we are in proves what God himself said in the very beginning, “It is not good (beneficial) for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper [one who balances him- a counterpart who is] suitable and complementary for him.” Genesis 2:18 AMP

As humans, we need each other. We thrive when we are together and able to interact. On the other hand, when we are alone we tend to struggle. That is when depression and discouragement take hold. We need others to build us up.

Today was one of those tough days for me. I am fortunately not alone in my “social distancing”, I have my husband and 3 girls who keep me on my toes. However, I do miss the “outside” world. I miss my rare date nights going out with my husband. I miss having coworkers to talk to and joke around with without staring at a computer screen to do it. I miss going to the grocery store without feeling like you are in a war zone because everyone around you is wearing masks.

Today was one of those days where I looked around the house that I have cleaned 3 or 4 times already this week that looks like an explosion of crumbs, toys, shoes, and dirty laundry…again. It was a day that I have already done two loads of dishes, and probably need to do another. Today was a day where I should have been at church hugging friends and instead, I was stuck in the messy house staring at a screen pretending like it is the same thing. We all know it isn’t.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am so thankful for the technology we do have to be able to interact virtually. As a matter of fact, I have loved getting to “attend” other churches in neighboring towns because of the fact that everyone is now live streaming their services. I have really enjoyed that. I also appreciate that I have the means to text or call someone. But like I said, it’s not the same.

So what’s the solution?

I have no idea. To be honest with you, I am only writing this because I felt like I am probably not the only one feeling the same way. I think that we all now realize how much we have taken human interaction for granted. I never valued the interruptions I had when I was trying to get work done at school like I do now. I also never valued how good it felt to go to a grocery store or restaurant without feeling like I may just be swimming in a sea of germs (even though we always have been, just never thought about it).

If nothing else, I hope that we all come out of this appreciating each other a little bit more. I know that even though my kiddos are messy, I do appreciate the fact that I get to experience more little moments with them, like today when my sweet 4 year old finally mastered pedalling a bike. I have also loved seeing them learn more about reptiles because of the lizard, horny toad, and frogs they have found while playing outside. There are definitely blessings coming out of this pandemic.

My prayer right now is for every lonely person whether they are surrounded by family or don’t have anyone else around. I pray for the depressed and the discouraged. Know that even in your loneliest moment, God is there.

“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39

Giveaway Time!

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

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During the last financial crisis, in 2009, I was laid off from my job. It was a scary time for me and my husband. It’s hard to explain the emotions you go through.

Now we are in a whole new era with a different kind of crisis. So many have once again been laid off or furloughed from their jobs. There is a lot of uncertainty. Because of that, I want to give away 5 copies of the book I wrote born out of my own time of crisis, Finding God in the Wilderness: Learning to Trust God During Times of Uncertainty.

Entering is easy, simply comment on this post for yourself or tell me about a friend who you would like to enter (you can definitely do both). Please share this post on your social media as well!.

I will pick 5 winners on my wedding anniversary, April 28th.

If you just can’t wait until then, you can order a copy here.

 

Time to Step it Up

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Best Friends Forever Stock Photos, Pictures & Royalty-Free Images ...

Ladies, this one is for you. I have something on my mind, and have for a little while, it’s time to share it: We have got to do better!!!

Let me explain.

I want to flash back to junior high and high school for a minute. I remember back in those days so often preferring to hang out with “the guys” simply because girls can be so cruel. One minute we were best friends, and the next there was drama for one reason or another. I have already started seeing this happen with my second grade daughter. It’s heartbreaking when she comes home from school telling me that someone was mean to her and she was left out of a game on the playground.

I’m not sure what it is about females that causes us to be insecure, competitive, and sometimes downright mean. This shouldn’t be! After all, we are the nurturers. We should naturally be protective and encouraging of each other. We should believe the best about each other, unfortunately it is often just the opposite.

I absolutely love the story of Jonathan and David in 1 Samuel. Their friendship was unrivaled. It says in 1 Samuel 18:3 “Then Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself.” Wow! Sign me up for that kind of friendship. I was re-reading the story of David and Jonathan the other night and I just couldn’t get over the selfless love they had for each other. They built each other up and encouraged each other, even though for Jonathan, it meant risking everything.

I have to admit, I am slightly jealous of my husband. He has never had a shortage of good friends. The thing about men, especially confident guys like my husband and most of the men he calls good friends, is they can just be relaxed and be themselves without comparison, judgement, or feeling like they have to portray themselves a certain way. I have some great female friends, but I can honestly say it has been years since I have had anything close to a “Jonathan/David” type of friendship. It seems like the older I get, the longer it takes us girls to tear down the walls between each other.

So what’s a girl to do? I want to issue a challenge that I myself have been try to do. I want to challenge every single woman who is reading this to go out of your way to encourage another woman. Whether that means speaking an encouraging word to someone, supporting a startup business, or even taking a younger woman under your wing, just do it! Be the friend that you want others to be to you! Use the idea of the golden rule: treat other women the way you want to be treated. Give the women you work with and do life with the benefit of the doubt.

When my husband and I first moved into the town where we live, 13 years ago, we had several couples in our church who took us in. We had no family in town, and really didn’t know anyone, but the people who poured into us then made so much of a difference. Be that person. Be the friend you wish others would be to you. Be the person to welcome someone new. Be the one to believe the best. Be the person to spread good news, and not rumors. Be the one to encourage another woman when she is trying something new. Be the one to build another woman up!!!

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Book Review: The Marriage Ark

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If you have been married for more than a day, it is pretty certain that you have encountered conflict in one form or another. It is inevitable for two people to live in a close relationship day in and day out without rubbing each other the wrong way from time to time. Regardless of whether you have been married in the past to someone else, have lived together, or have been dating for a long time, when you get married you enter a new level of relationship. This new relationship is one you enter with all the best intentions to make last, yet around 41% of 1st marriages end in divorce. I have yet to attend a wedding where the bride, or groom didn’t have all sorts of dreams about the future, none of which included divorce.

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In The Marriage Ark: Securing Your Marriage in a Sea of Uncertainty, author Margaret Phillips walks through how to build a strong marriage from 30+ years of experience as a licensed marriage and family therapist. She uses the story of Noah and the uncertainties he faced as an analogy for marriage. She really focuses on first the foundation of the marriage. She talks about how vital it is to look at things realistically, not in the technicolor glasses that so many people enter marriage with.

Throughout this short book, the author give some great advice about how to avoid major conflict before they start, especially for those who are not yet married. She also addresses how important it is to have the flexibility to withstand the natural twists and turns that you will encounter as a married couple. So many of us, myself included, enter marriage with the 20 year plan of how life is going to look. News flash: that twenty year plan rarely turns out exactly like you have it planned out. I know that from experience! 13 years into this marriage thing and my life looks much different than that wedding day plan. Different is not always bad though.

This is such a great book to add to your collection, whether you have been married 30 years, are engaged, or maybe just hope to get married someday. The author has so many practical tips to guide readers on how to deal with conflict, loss, and change. I really hope you will check this book out. If you would like a chance to win your own copy, please check out my Facebook page here.

A Matter of Trust

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The world has gone mad. I have go to be honest, what’s going on before our very eyes feels slightly like the vibe before Y2K mixed with the market crash in 2008…only amplified. Fear has taken hold and the world has gone a bit off the rails. Honestly, it kind of breaks my heart to see how quickly people have become selfish and panicked.

Is selfishness a sin?

No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.

1 Corinthians 10:24 NIV

I was thinking about how many things we take for granted today, and it really humbled me. People are buying every item off a grocery store shelf, when just 2 weeks ago we took for granted how easy it was to get practically anything you wanted or needed at a big box store, or even with the click of a button on your phone app. Now the one item we probably all took for granted the most, toilet paper, has disappeared off the shelves and people have turned into hoarders overnight. I think it would be a great idea to take a deep breath and just think through all the things that we enjoy in this country. Is it inconvenient, absolutely. The uncertainty of what is to come over the next few days, weeks, and months can be a little unnerving if you sit and think about it too much.

One of my favorite verses during stressful times is Matthew 6:25-27 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?”

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These birds don’t worry about a thing

I love the thought of that. Birds don’t worry, they just live one day at a time.

At our house we have quite a few animals running around. I can attest to the fact that they don’t worry about their future. They focus on right now. Their mode of operation never includes fretting about the upcoming winter or having the latest in ear tag fashion. No, instead they are focused on right now. I think we could learn a lot about a better way to live by observing the creatures around us. Prepare for the seasons ahead of us, but don’t fret about them.

With all this panic about a new virus floating around, and the massive damage it is doing to our economy, it is so easy to get pulled into fear and dread about the future. However, we have to remember: through it all God is still in control. I love the childlike faith of my girls. They don’t panic about the future. They dream of what could be. They talk about how they want to be teachers, singers, or doctors. They play pretend and have no fear of what is going on. They know that their mom and dad are going to take care of them, so they don’t have to worry. We need to be more like that. If God can create us out of nothing and uniquely gift each and every one of us, then nothing is too big for him, not even this virus.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

Not For The Faint Of Heart

/ bekoepke

I remember when I was a newlywed and I would see kids acting up in public or moms frazzled and stressed, I thought to myself that if I had kids it would be different. I mean I had babysat before, how hard could it really be?

Oh boy, have I been humbled.

I absolutely love my girls. They are so smart and seem to learn something new everyday. They never cease to amaze me with their unique personalities and creativity. That being said, this mom gig is the hardest job I have ever had in my life. Every time you start to get confident and feel like you have got this motherhood thing down, something changes.

These last two week have been quite the experience in my world. All of the fun started last Wednesday. My redneck girls love to play outside and are definitely not afraid to get dirty. For several days, these crazy girls had spent hours digging a hole in a dirt pile that we have looking for lizards. Mind you, it is too cold to find lizards, but that did not deter them. Unfortunately, my oldest was focused on her digging game and did not notice her sister was behind her, right in the path of the shovel. As expected, that encounter did not end well. My middle child got a tooth knocked out of place and a small chip off another tooth. Nothing in any parent book can prepare you for something like that!

Not really that big of a deal, you might be thinking to yourself. Lots of kids get teeth knocked out of place or chipped. Inconvenient, yes, earth shattering, no. Well, as Paul Harvey used to say, let me give you the “rest of the story”.

Over the next two days we juggled schedules (not an easy task this time of year) and got her to the dentist just to check everything out. Fortunately she is 5 1/2 years old, so we are probably within 12 months of losing those teeth anyway, so he said just to keep an eye on them, no special treatment (and no expensive dental procedures).

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Crisis averted! Well, for another day anyway. Sadly, the next crisis was only a day away. Saturday was a gorgeous day and we are within days of a good majority of our goats having babies (yay!!!). We worked all day long outside; moving goats, cleaning up, setting up a pen inside for them to kid, and moving cows and our billy goat to different pens. We had a lot to accomplish and got a ton done.

The girls were all outside helping when they could, and playing when they couldn’t. My oldest (once again) was tasked with moving a board and that is when crisis #2 happened. Without her realizing it, my youngest was right behind her and when she stepped back. She knocked both her sister and herself over. That’s when it happened. Head of oldest child hit, you guessed it, youngest child’s head. More specifically, youngest child’s teeth. As a matter of fact, it was the exact same tooth and knocked back in the exact same way as her older sister.

There is no category for something like that. Two children, the same tooth on each, in a 4 day span. Of course, it was on a Saturday so we just had to wait until Monday when I hauled the second child to the dentist for the exact same thing. I would be lying if I told you that I wasn’t afraid of CPS being called on me. However, the dentist laughed and decided to send us to a pediatric dentist because she is a lot younger. So, we wait for a verdict for my youngest child until we go see a specialist (always a cheap prospect).

There is nothing in this world that can prepare you for all the unique challenges of motherhood. You could read every motherhood book ever written and still be completely clueless because kids are not predictable. However, to all the other mommas out there in my same boat, know that you are not alone. We are in this together and will get to the other side.

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My crazy injured-tooth girls

This parenting thing is not for the faint of heart. We need to remember that. Show grace for the other moms out there. We are all doing our best, even if that doesn’t look the same for every person. Give yourself grace, it isn’t easy raising little humans. God is on our side and He is there when it gets stressful and seems impossible.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

John 16:33 NIV

Book Review: Resilient

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

As a mom, one of my biggest struggles is how exactly to “train up a child in the way they should go” (see Proverbs 22:6). This world is a scary place. As a public school teacher to primarily freshmen, I see this firsthand every single day. Everything from peer pressure, to phone addictions, to bullying, to drugs and alcohol use go on every single day. Not to mention, especially with all three of my children being girls, the temptations they will face with boys. It can be overwhelming at times. I also don’t want to raise my girls to be fake in their Christianity. I want them to be all in, not just on a Sunday morning. I want them to be excited about their beliefs, but I want them to be just that: THEIR beliefs. I want them to discover faith for themselves.

Discipleship of our children should be at the forefront of every Christian’s mind. Especially in the secular world we live in that seems to be running away from Christianity as fast as possible. When given the opportunity to review a book about discipling children, I was very interested.

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Resilient: Child Discipleship and the Fearless Future of the Church is a much needed resource not only for parents, but for the church as a whole. The focus of the book is on the church of 2050. The authors focus on the kids of today that will be leading the church in the future. They take a realistic look at the current state of kid’s ministries (or KidMin, as they refer to it). They point out some of the areas that may be lacking in children’s ministries that may not be giving kids tools to thrive in this secular world. They give some specific strategies to help reach the kids in this current generation.

This book does a great job of looking at the great things of the past, and coming up with ways do disciple the children of the future. It also looks at discipleship from two perspective, that of a parent raising children today, as well as for the church that is trying to disciple children. It is very unique and even gives specific ideas that a church could initiate.

Like I mentioned earlier, discipling my own children is something that I often think about. I see kids today who lack morals, work ethic, and integrity, the last thing in the world I want is for my kids to be one of them. I want my girls to “seek first the kingdom of God” in absolutely everything they do. I don’t want them to feel like they have to follow the whims of the secular world they live in. I want them to have a strong faith foundation that is their own, not just because their parents have a certain set of beliefs. Resilient gives me some great advice on how to do that.

If you would like to get a copy of this book you can find out more and get your own copy here. Better yet, you can also enter to win one here. I hope you will take a look at this book, the future of the church really does depend on how we disciple the children of today.

 

Book Review: Off the Hook

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So many of us have them. That person, or those people who once upon a time did something that hurt us, and we carry that burden with us. Every time we see them the hurt rushes back over us. We can go from having a great day, do a deep pit of despair just with a memory of what they did to us. We can’t seem to let it go. Forgiveness doesn’t seem possible, because after all, they were the ones that did us wrong. We shouldn’t let them off the hook easily, right? The sad thing about that line of thinking though, is that us holding onto the hurt, only really hurts us.

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Off the Hook: How Forgiving You Frees Me, deals with that very topic. You may not even realize that you are holding onto unforgiveness, until you are able to walk the path of forgiveness. Off the Hook uses stories of real life people who had to deal with very difficult forgiveness journeys, but were able to experience freedom that they never thought possible when they did. The authors also use Biblical truths to help the reader know how to truly forgive.

Throughout the book there are sections revealing Lies that we believe, as well as truths that will set us free. The forgiveness in this book is also not limited to that person who hurt you. They also address how to forgive when you have been hurt by the one institution that is supposed to lift you up, the church. This is a book for every single person, even if you don’t think it would apply. We all have areas of unforgiveness in our lives, and it is so freeing to find those areas and learn to truly forgive.

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If you would like to learn more, please visit the Off the Hook webpage or watch this book trailer to see more details. You can also enter to win your own copy here. If you just can’t wait and want to get a copy for yourself, the authors are running a Kindle Countdown sale February 20-27 starting at $0.99 1st day. (Regular price $5.99)! I hope that you will get a copy and get rid of some of the heaviness of unforgiveness in your own life!

Win 1

Bible Review and Giveaway: He Reads Truth

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

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I am extremely excited to bring you something a little outside my wheelhouse. As a matter of fact, I had to call in the big guns for this one: my husband. I thought that it was only right to get a man’s perspective, since the all new He Reads Truth Bible is written for men.

Let me give you some of the specifics first. The copy I received is a hard cover that also has a storage box. This Christian Standard Bible (CSB) features 66 hand-lettered key verses, 17 full-color timelines, 21 maps, 122 charts (including infographics and lists), and 4 illustrations. There are also reading plans for every book of the Bible, a one-year Bible reading plan, detailed book introductions, a key verse list, two colored ribbon markers, and wide margins for journaling and note taking.

I am a huge fan of the CSB version, it is so easy to read and understand. So the big question is, what did my husband think? There are several things that he really liked about this Bible. The first thing he noted was the reading plans with check boxes. He is a huge list guy, this would be a great way for him to have a structured way to read through either a book of the Bible, or the entire Bible. He also really liked the outline, history, and introductions for each book of the Bible. As a history major and former social studies teacher, that is a huge plus. He also said that it has good reading passages and explanations throughout the different books of the Bible. One example he gave was a passage about God’s covenant with us. The final thing he mentioned was that he liked the key verses section at the end of the Bible. After he spent some time reading and looking it through, he told me that it would probably become his new go-to Bible. I would say it has his stamp of approval!

If you want to see more check out this video

I hope that you will check out this Bible and consider getting one for the man (or men) in your life. One way to do that is by entering the giveaway here. Or, if you would rather buy one you can go to lifeway.com and use the coupon code HEREADS50 to receive 50% off your order!!! (code is valid through 4/1/20).

5 Smooth Stones

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stones

I absolutely love David. It doesn’t matter if we are talking about the shepherd boy, entertainer of King Saul, soldier, or King, I just love reading about his progression through both his faith and his life. I would go so far as to say he is one of my spiritual heroes (minus the whole adultery/murder part). God himself found David as a man after His heart.  “But God removed Saul and replaced him with David, a man about whom God said, ‘I have found David son of Jesse, a man after my own heart. He will do everything I want him to do.’” Acts 13:22 (NLT). What an amazing statement. I pray that even through my own mistakes and lapses of judgement, God sees me as someone after His own heart and that will do His will.

I think that as Christians (myself included), we often believe that if we just do what’s right, everything should be smooth sailing. We think that life should be comfortable and easy if we just say and do the right things. The American Christian church is especially guilty of this. We have grown accustomed to ease and comfort, so we feel like we must put on a façade of perfection. Social media only fuels this fire because we can portray ourselves any way we want. What a travesty! No one has a perfect life, nor will we. Honestly, I am thankful that things aren’t perfect because if they were we would miss seeing the blessings through our struggles. 

The very thought of an easy life actually goes completely against the teachings of Jesus himself. He did say “take up your cross and follow me” (see Matthew 16:24-26). That phrase has become somewhat cliché in our modern society. He was literally saying “take up your instrument of extreme torture and death and follow me”.  This wasn’t some cute cross to hang on the wall. He was essentially saying “be ready for a rough ride but I’m right here beside you”.

If you look at the life of David, that is essentially what he did. He believed that God was with him no matter what he was experiencing. He had a bold faith that he was not afraid to share. So many Christians live incognito in this world. We believe in God but don’t want to be perceived as “different”, so we sacrifice some of our beliefs on the altar of fitting in. David didn’t care about that. Even in the darkest moments of his life when he was literally running for his life, he chose to praise God. He was never afraid to go into danger, because he knew God was with him.

I love the story of David and Goliath for many reasons (see 1 Samuel 17). First, I love when God uses unexpected people to advance His kingdom. I also love that He uses unqualified people to achieve incredible victories. David was a teenage shepherd who had never been near a battlefield, much less encountered a soldier with the skills and stature of Goliath. However, he trusted God so much that he chose to go to battle with the only weapon he knew how to use: a slingshot. He passed up using the King’s own armor because it was far too heavy and he wasn’t used to it. Instead, he went and found 5 smooth stones from a stream and went to battle. Here is what I love that I never thought about until this week; David grabbed 5 stones, God gave him the victory with only 1. Wow! Not only was David underqualified, underage, and under skilled, he was also underprepared with only 5 pieces of ammo. However, God gave the victory to a young man with a willing heart and only needed 1 stone to do it. All David had to do was obey. 

So, what is God asking you to do? Even if you feel like David and are underqualified, underage, under skilled, and underprepared, God can use whatever stone you bring to the table. All you have to do is bring it!