gratitude

Beyond Jericho

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If you know me at all (or have read absolutely anything I have written), you probably know that the story of the Israelites has inspired, taught, and corrected me for many years now. If you know me, you will also probably know that change tends to be a difficult thing for me. I am a creature of habit. I like routine and I especially like operating within my comfort zones. However, God doesn’t always allow me to stay in those comfort zones. As a matter of fact, it seems like the more I choose to trust and follow Him, the more He tends to shake up those routines and drag me out of my comfort zones.

We recently relocated our family 200 miles from where we have lived all but 3 months of our married life. Talk about a change!!! Routines have changed, housing has changed, jobs have changed, church has changed, and relationships have changed. Change isn’t bad, it is just different. We have learned so much about the provision of God through this experience. It is incredible to think about all the open doors that God has shown us to get from there to here. It has been a blessing. However, the moments leading up to those open doors are often pretty stressful. Unfortunately, God doesn’t take us from Point A to Point B on the easy road. Man, there are lots of moments that I wish He did. Instead, like He did with the Israelites, He may take the longer route to get us where He wants us to go. Sometimes, He takes us the long way on purpose. “When Pharaoh let the people go, God did not lead them on the road through the Philistine country, though that was shorter. For God said, ‘If they face war, they might change their minds and return to Egypt.'” Exodus 13:17 NIV. God knows not only what we are currently going through, but He also sees what is coming up around the next bend. There are times he leads us through it, and times that He takes us around the long way. What we need to know though, is that He always has the end destination, the promised land, in mind.

A picture I took of our old home before we left with our last load this summer

If that is the case though, why do we have such a hard time trusting each time we face a new challenge? The Israelites entered the promised land as soon as they crossed the Jordan river. However, that didn’t mean the battles were over. First up was Jericho which, as you may know, was a miraculous victory that did not involve a single sword from the Israelites (see Joshua 6). What is funny, is that where moved from, I always thought of as our Jericho. We literally prayed circles around our old home the way Joshua and the Israelites prayed circles around Jericho. We also saw provision much like the Israelites did. What I didn’t consider though, was that Jericho was the entryway to the promised land, not the destination. Had the Israelites stopped at Jericho, they would have technically “arrived” in the promised land. However, God wanted more for them. He wanted them to receive all of what He had for them, not just settle for the first victory.

I think the same is true in our own lives (and I am preaching to myself here). We experience a blessing from God and never move on from there. We settle for the revival that happened 30 years ago and think that we just need to be grateful for that and never ask for more. Or maybe God did something miraculous 10 years ago and so we think it is ungrateful to want another miracle today. I find myself in that boat sometimes. That is not what scripture tells us though. I love the way the amplified version of Matthew 7:7 says it: “Ask and keep on asking and it will be given to you; seek and keep on seeking and you will find; knock and keep on knocking and the door will be opened to you.” As far as I can tell that is both present tense and future tense. We are not to stop asking just because we receive the answer one time. We are not to stop seeking and knocking just because we found one door and it opened for us. We are to keep going. What is good and perfect for us today, may be old and stale tomorrow.

The Israelites had to keep going to fully take possession of the promised land. That journey was not always as easy as walking circles around a town either. They often fought very hard, and bloody battles. Unfortunately none of us is promised easy, but we are promised that He will be with us. “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9 ESV.

I sure wish that was as easy to believe during those times as it is to quote! Lord, help us to remember those words and to be strong and courageous not just when we are in our comfortable, but also when you take us through the unknowns of life.

What the Enemy Meant for Evil

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There is a song by Elevation Worship that has been a go-to for me for the last few months. It is called See a Victory (you can listen here). It is based on 1 Corinthians 15:57 “But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” The first verse says “The weapon may be formed, but it won’t prosper. When the darkness falls, it won’t prevail. ‘Cause the God I serve knows only how to triumph. My God will never fail.” The bridge goes on to say “You take what the enemy meant for evil, and turn it for good”.

I absolutely love that!

I don’t know of anyone who hasn’t felt the attack of the enemy from time to time. Sometimes the attack is in overt ways, other times those attacks come out of the blue. They can be from perfect strangers, or people you trust the most. It always hurts the most when it comes from someone you know and trust. However, we live in a fallen world, sometimes the enemy even uses people we love to hurt us. Sadly no one is immune from the attacks of the enemy, and he always seems to strike where we are weak or vulnerable.

However, we can take heart, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” Romans 8:28. I can attest to the truth of that through some of what I have experienced. Closed doors always lead to new, open doors. But when you are in the heart of the battle, that is a tough truth to hold onto. I know that I often find myself pulled into discouragement, fear, or even depression when I am still going through the “thing” even if I know that God will work it out for good. Like the song says, You take what the enemy meant for evil, and turn it for good. I believe that, but Lord, I need help with my unbelief. Take what the enemy meant for evil, and turn it for good for all those who need a victory!

Marked Moments

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“Nothing is a surprise to God; nothing is a setback to His plans; nothing can thwart His purposes; and nothing is beyond his control.”

This quote was spoken by Joni Eareckson Tada, one of the most unlikely people to speak such a thing because she has been a quadriplegic since the age of 17. This quote speaks volumes to me. I believe with all my heart that God is in control, I just wish I could get that through to my head sometimes. I know that I don’t always act like it, but I do know it’s true.

I believe that there are moments that can change the trajectory of our lives in an instant. Some of my own examples include asking a friend of mine to a college formal (I ended up marrying that friend), getting laid off from a job I thought I would have forever, making the decision to become a teacher, and having a sweet surprise 3rd child, just to name a few. Those moments may be exciting, or devastating, but they mark us in a way that we are never quite the same.

I absolutely love the story of Joseph (It starts in Genesis 37). He goes through so many things leading from the dreams to the palace. His troubles all started because of a combination of his bragging ways and his evil brothers selling him into slavery. This lead him to eventually end up in prison. However, all the sorrows he went through, became the catalyst to become the 2nd in command in the palace. He needed these experiences to refine him. To humble his ego, learn to submit to authority, and always do the right thing, even when it ended in wrong results.

I can’t help but think the same is true in our own lives. Every experience, every setback, every frustration, and every triumph are all designed to take us from where we are to where God wants us to be. However, it is up to us to push through the hard times with integrity. When we don’t, we may end up needing to learn those lessons again.

I teach a lot of juniors and seniors. In Texas, they have to take and pass a lot of tests to graduation high school. When they don’t learn the lessons needed to pass the first time, they have the opportunity to try again. In order for those kids to be successful they must be in tutorial classes and re-learn much of the information. God does the same with us. If we fail the pride lesson, he gives us more opportunities to learn humility before we are ready for the next lesson. He never gives us a test we aren’t prepared for. However, He may give us a test we really don’t want. That’s the part I don’t like.

I want to refer back to the quote I started with. “Nothing is a surprise to God; nothing is a setback to His plans; nothing can thwart His purposes; and nothing is beyond his control.” Joni has now been wheelchair bound for over 50 years, yet has reached hundreds of thousands of people with her ministry and was also instrumental in helping the Americans with Disabilities Act get passed. I am sure she had no idea at the age of 17 the impact that she would have. I am also sure that 50 years from now, you have no idea what purpose the challenges you are going through are going to serve. Now, you may not be headed to 2nd in command of a kingdom or leading a worldwide ministry. But maybe you, like me, have a few kids, grandkids, or people who look up to you that see how you live your life and face your challenges. What they see from you will minister for generations to come, in good or bad ways.

We all have moments that mark our lives. Let’s use those marked moments to propel us into the next level of what God has in store for us.

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28

Grafted

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Oreo and little orphan Buck

If this image looks a little strange to you, it’s because it is. We raise a breed of goats that are called Boer (they are the ones with white bodies and red heads typically). However, we also have a handful of Lamancha dairy goats that we inherited with some of the Boers that we purchased a few years ago. Lamanchas are an interesting breed of goat because they are some of the most gentle, even tempered goats you will ever meet. The drawback is that they are ugly as sin because they have no ears and they are not really a market animal (which is what we are in the business for). Well, this particular black and white Lamancha, Oreo, is such a sweetheart. Unfortunately, she had a hard time giving birth to her very first baby last weekend and ended up delivering a stillborn, that my husband had to help pull. Rather than her finding out that her kid didn’t make it, I quickly grabbed my little bottle baby, Buck, so that we could try to graft him onto her.

Little Buck couldn’t even stand up for over a week after he was born

Let me give you a little back story. Buck was born a little over a month ago and was the runt of a set of triplets. He was not able to stand up and his mother really didn’t tend to him. After trying throughout the day, unsuccessfully, to get her to tend to him and get him to stand up, we finally decided to get him inside and get him warmed up and fed. Since that time he has been my little bottle baby. He lived in a small water trough inside our house for about 3 weeks so that I could feed him (forcefully to begin with) and treat a nasty eye infection. Over time he healed and started standing, walking, running, and finally got well enough that we couldn’t even keep him in his little makeshift pen because he would just jump out. So we moved him to a little pen out in the barn with the other goats.

Buck in his new home in the barn when we moved him out of the house

My goal has always been to get him a real goat mom, but I was unsuccessful trying to get his actual mom to take him back. Goats are funny about that. Once they abandon a kid, they will not take them back. So I went along just feeding him several times a day. That all changed a week ago when I finally had a mom that needed a baby.

It has taken the full week but the picture at the top was the very first time she was letting him nurse without me having to be in there with her. It is an amazing feeling (even if it is a goat) to see an orphan gain a mom. And that got me to thinking about a few things.

I realized that every single person who calls themselves a Christian is also an orphan that has been grafted into a new family. “But some of these branches from Abraham’s tree—some of the people of Israel—have been broken off. And you Gentiles, who were branches from a wild olive tree, have been grafted in. So now you also receive the blessing God has promised Abraham and his children, sharing in the rich nourishment from the root of God’s special olive tree.” Romans 11:17 NLT

Grafting is an interesting process in the plant world. It is essentially taking part of one plant and putting it with another to make it grow as one. As time goes on in the process, the plant being grafted on (called the cutting or scion) takes on the characteristics of the one it is being grafted too (called the rootstock). Grafting is not a simple, or painless, process. As a matter of fact it involves cutting, bandaging, and a lot of time. This is often done when a plant has rooted poorly, or not all, and would die otherwise.

WOW! Isn’t that an analogy for us? Our process of grafting into the family of God is not necessarily a painless one. Sometimes there are things that need to be cut away and lots of time for healing past wounds. Nonetheless, we are called Sons and Daughters of God. We have been adopted, but we are chosen as heirs to the very kingdom of God. “And since we are his children, we are his heirs. In fact, together with Christ we are heirs of God’s glory. But if we are to share his glory, we must also share his suffering.” Romans 8:17 NLT

Did you catch that last little part? Yes, we are His children, but we are also not immune to suffering on this earth. So, while you go through the pains and frustrations that can come with your own grafting process, I want to encourage you with this: as you heal and are fully grafted, you will also grow closer to the source of life and with that you will also start to take on the characteristics of the rootstock. So no matter what you are going though, push through the pain and remember that you are already grafted and accepted just as you are.

But also remember this: just because you are accepted exactly as you are, that doesn’t mean God is going to leave you that way!

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will return to you.” Psalm 51:10-12 ESV

Don’t Create An Ishmael While You Wait On Your Isaac

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I am an extremely impatient person, as many of you may be.  I remember a particular Christmas as a kid when I actually tiptoed out of my room with a flashlight before dawn just to see what Santa had brought, then went back to bed and pretended to be surprised in the morning when I could finally get up (sorry mom).  I hate having to wait on things, especially if it is something I really want.
Over the years, I have really had to learn how to be patient.  One of the many areas I have had to learn the lesson of patience, has been in my finances.  When I first got married I knew nothing other than simply throwing things on a credit card or loan.  In my first few months of marriage in the process of building a home, my husband and I acquired one of the things many married couples do: debt.  We wound up with the Home Depot Card, Furniture Row Card, and a few other cards and debts.  Of course, we could have saved a little money by buying used, but hey we were married now so we deserved to buy new; regardless of whether we could afford the “things” or not.  Thank goodness, about 9 months after we were married, we wound up going through Financial Peace University (a class that teaches about finances from a Biblical perspective by Dave Ramsey) through our small group at church.  This course opened our eyes to see how important getting and staying out of debt was, and really revolutionized our thought process when it came to money.  We have had to make some tough decisions in order to not go back into the debt we use to live under.  It has not always been easy, but has always been worth it.
If you know the story of Abraham in the Bible, you know that there was a little bit of dysfunction in his life.  God had promised him a son, but time was ticking away and still he had no son.  His wife decided that since she couldn’t have a son that they could “rig it” and he could have a son through her servant Hagar (what wife in her right mind would do that???).  It worked, Hagar became pregnant and had a son she named Ishmael.  However, that was not he son God had promised.  Abraham and Sarah had jumped the gun and ended up with less than God’s best for them. One of my favorite things about this story is the fact that even though Abraham and Sarah had royally messed up (and we still feel the affects of this mess up all these years later, just look at the middle east), God continued to hold up his end of the promise.  The real blessing was Isaac who would be born from Sarah 14 years later. “The Lord kept his word and did for Sarah exactly what he had promised. She became pregnant, and she gave birth to a son for Abraham in his old age. This happened at just the time God had said it would.” Genesis 21:1-2 NLT.
So many of us create our own Ishmael in the process of waiting on our Isaac.  It is so hard to wait, especially if things look impossible.  Things looked impossible for Abraham.  After all, he was 86 when Ishmael came along and 100 when Isaac finally arrived.  Talk about a long wait!  I honestly don’t blame them for trying their own way to make things happen.  However, had they simply waited and trusted in God, they could have avoided a lot of heartache.
So what is your Ishmael?  Have you entered into a bad relationship simply because you didn’t want to wait on who God has for you?  Or have you gotten yourself into insane amounts of debt because you didn’t want to wait and save up?  Or maybe you tried to force God’s hand on another thing you feel you have been promised and have made a mess of it.  Whatever your Ishmael, remember that God is true to his promises.  He has an Isaac in store if we can simply wait on His timing.

Tough Days

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Frazzled Mom Cartoon Clipart | Tired mom, Frazzled mom, Busy mom

We are living in a very strange time right now. I have to admit, I am a little bit of a hermit in my normal life (as much as is possible as a public school teacher surrounded by people all day). I cherish the moments I get alone with no one demanding of me, whether it is a high schooler needing help on a math problem, or my own 3 children. However, this is different. This “social distancing” isolation thing is not the same as me shutting my classroom door during the lunch period to get work done and have a few moments alone to listen to my podcasts. No, this world that we are in proves what God himself said in the very beginning, “It is not good (beneficial) for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper [one who balances him- a counterpart who is] suitable and complementary for him.” Genesis 2:18 AMP

As humans, we need each other. We thrive when we are together and able to interact. On the other hand, when we are alone we tend to struggle. That is when depression and discouragement take hold. We need others to build us up.

Today was one of those tough days for me. I am fortunately not alone in my “social distancing”, I have my husband and 3 girls who keep me on my toes. However, I do miss the “outside” world. I miss my rare date nights going out with my husband. I miss having coworkers to talk to and joke around with without staring at a computer screen to do it. I miss going to the grocery store without feeling like you are in a war zone because everyone around you is wearing masks.

Today was one of those days where I looked around the house that I have cleaned 3 or 4 times already this week that looks like an explosion of crumbs, toys, shoes, and dirty laundry…again. It was a day that I have already done two loads of dishes, and probably need to do another. Today was a day where I should have been at church hugging friends and instead, I was stuck in the messy house staring at a screen pretending like it is the same thing. We all know it isn’t.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I am so thankful for the technology we do have to be able to interact virtually. As a matter of fact, I have loved getting to “attend” other churches in neighboring towns because of the fact that everyone is now live streaming their services. I have really enjoyed that. I also appreciate that I have the means to text or call someone. But like I said, it’s not the same.

So what’s the solution?

I have no idea. To be honest with you, I am only writing this because I felt like I am probably not the only one feeling the same way. I think that we all now realize how much we have taken human interaction for granted. I never valued the interruptions I had when I was trying to get work done at school like I do now. I also never valued how good it felt to go to a grocery store or restaurant without feeling like I may just be swimming in a sea of germs (even though we always have been, just never thought about it).

If nothing else, I hope that we all come out of this appreciating each other a little bit more. I know that even though my kiddos are messy, I do appreciate the fact that I get to experience more little moments with them, like today when my sweet 4 year old finally mastered pedalling a bike. I have also loved seeing them learn more about reptiles because of the lizard, horny toad, and frogs they have found while playing outside. There are definitely blessings coming out of this pandemic.

My prayer right now is for every lonely person whether they are surrounded by family or don’t have anyone else around. I pray for the depressed and the discouraged. Know that even in your loneliest moment, God is there.

“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39

5 Smooth Stones

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stones

I absolutely love David. It doesn’t matter if we are talking about the shepherd boy, entertainer of King Saul, soldier, or King, I just love reading about his progression through both his faith and his life. I would go so far as to say he is one of my spiritual heroes (minus the whole adultery/murder part). God himself found David as a man after His heart.  “But God removed Saul and replaced him with David, a man about whom God said, ‘I have found David son of Jesse, a man after my own heart. He will do everything I want him to do.’” Acts 13:22 (NLT). What an amazing statement. I pray that even through my own mistakes and lapses of judgement, God sees me as someone after His own heart and that will do His will.

I think that as Christians (myself included), we often believe that if we just do what’s right, everything should be smooth sailing. We think that life should be comfortable and easy if we just say and do the right things. The American Christian church is especially guilty of this. We have grown accustomed to ease and comfort, so we feel like we must put on a façade of perfection. Social media only fuels this fire because we can portray ourselves any way we want. What a travesty! No one has a perfect life, nor will we. Honestly, I am thankful that things aren’t perfect because if they were we would miss seeing the blessings through our struggles. 

The very thought of an easy life actually goes completely against the teachings of Jesus himself. He did say “take up your cross and follow me” (see Matthew 16:24-26). That phrase has become somewhat cliché in our modern society. He was literally saying “take up your instrument of extreme torture and death and follow me”.  This wasn’t some cute cross to hang on the wall. He was essentially saying “be ready for a rough ride but I’m right here beside you”.

If you look at the life of David, that is essentially what he did. He believed that God was with him no matter what he was experiencing. He had a bold faith that he was not afraid to share. So many Christians live incognito in this world. We believe in God but don’t want to be perceived as “different”, so we sacrifice some of our beliefs on the altar of fitting in. David didn’t care about that. Even in the darkest moments of his life when he was literally running for his life, he chose to praise God. He was never afraid to go into danger, because he knew God was with him.

I love the story of David and Goliath for many reasons (see 1 Samuel 17). First, I love when God uses unexpected people to advance His kingdom. I also love that He uses unqualified people to achieve incredible victories. David was a teenage shepherd who had never been near a battlefield, much less encountered a soldier with the skills and stature of Goliath. However, he trusted God so much that he chose to go to battle with the only weapon he knew how to use: a slingshot. He passed up using the King’s own armor because it was far too heavy and he wasn’t used to it. Instead, he went and found 5 smooth stones from a stream and went to battle. Here is what I love that I never thought about until this week; David grabbed 5 stones, God gave him the victory with only 1. Wow! Not only was David underqualified, underage, and under skilled, he was also underprepared with only 5 pieces of ammo. However, God gave the victory to a young man with a willing heart and only needed 1 stone to do it. All David had to do was obey. 

So, what is God asking you to do? Even if you feel like David and are underqualified, underage, under skilled, and underprepared, God can use whatever stone you bring to the table. All you have to do is bring it!

Every Rose Has It’s Thorns

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Image result for I thank thee for the roses, help me to thank thee for the thorns

If you have read very much of my writing, you will likely know that one of my biggest pet peeves is ungratefulness. It drives me absolutely insane when people don’t say thank you when someone does something for them, goes out of their way to help them, or perhaps when they have been given a gift. Although it is a challenge a lot of the time, I am trying very hard to teach my girls to always say thank you (not always successfully, I might add), and I think that adults should do the same. That being said, my own hypocrisy kicks in sometimes and I don’t always thank people when I should. Toward the end of last year I made a goal of trying to be more thankful. I thought I would give a little update on how that has been going.

Rejoice always, pray continually,  give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.  I Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV

That verse has always been a little convicting to me. Always, continually, and in all circumstances. That’s a lot. Especially the part about giving thanks in all circumstances. I want so badly to edit that one word and change it to give thanks in good circumstances. This has been a tough school year so far in my household. I have a group of students that seem to struggle a little more than most years with being able to pass tests, which is creating a little extra stress in my world trying to find creative ways to get through to them. My girls are getting older and have more going on as far as homework and school activities, which is keeping us a little busier. My husband is a principal, and he has dealt with some challenging situations of his own throughout the year. When we are deep in the trenches of everyday life, that whole concept of give thanks in all circumstances can be pretty tough. It’s tough to say thanks when things are going wrong.

However, in the same way I get irritated when people are ungrateful, how much more must God get frustrated when we aren’t thankful. King David probably didn’t feel much like thanking God for the lion or the bear attacking his sheep, but those battles are exactly what prepared him for the battle against Goliath. What if these frustrating moments are the exact things we should be giving thanks for?

I have tried to make a point to thank the people in my life that I really felt compelled to thank. Over the last 2 months I have written several thank you notes that were probably way overdue. As I write this, I remembered one other person who really needs to be thanked for their hard work (I will make sure that happens this week). As I think about how to carry this challenge forward, I can’t help but think about how easy it is for me to say thank you when something is benefitting me, but when it is flipped and things are not going as planned, I have such a hard time being grateful. So that is where I am going to try and focus going forward. I want to be better at giving thanks in all circumstances.

George Matheson once said in one of his more well-know sermons, “My God, I have never thanked Thee for my thorn. I have thanked Thee a thousand times for my roses, but not once for my thorn.” I have that same problem. I can be so thankful for the blessings, but have a hard time being thankful during life’s frustrations. Lord, help me to thank thee for my thorn!

When I started writing my book Finding God in the Wilderness, I was able to look back and see how those thorny situations that felt like a wilderness, were really leading me to the next phase of promised land. Looking back, it is often easier to see the blessings in the challenges. I don’t want to have to wait though. I want to learn how to be more thankful during the challenge. I want to walk into my classroom and thank God for giving me the students that He did. I want to wake up every morning thanking God for strong willed girls. I want to know that anything I go though is growing me into the person God is calling me to be.

Let’s all start this new year learning more every day how to “thank Thee for the thorns”.

 

 

As A Gentle Whisper

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As a teacher of mostly 9th graders, I see every single day how much the creativity of people can be harmed by this instant gratitude, always entertained world we live in. Let’s just be honest, we are all guilty of this from time to time. Almost everyone has an entertainment system that they carry in their pocket, purse, or backpack at all times; the cell phone. Take a look around at practically any waiting room, restaurant, or even stoplight, and you will see grown humans grabbing for that phone and constantly having to be entertained. I am not innocent, and likely you aren’t either.

I have always tried to be careful to not allow too much technology into my girls’ world too soon, but I also don’t want to shelter them so that they don’t know how to use it. As a momma, this can be a very difficult thing to balance. I have never been the mom to just hand off my phone to keep my kids quiet. As a matter of fact, I never have, don’t even have kid’s games loaded on it. On the other hand, my eldest daughter does know how to turn on her cartoons and find movies on our television. It is such a hard balance. We have given in recently to the benefits of apps and websites for reading and math remediation for our girls, and do appreciate the things they are learning. However, when I see kids in my classes texting on smart watches and staring down at the phone “hidden” in their laps, or, like one creative student, in their pencil bag that they can see through to text or snapchat, I want to make sure my kids aren’t addicted to it. I want them to find meaningful real-life relationships. I also want them to find their value in knowing who they are in Christ, not because of social media likes.

I love seeing the imaginations of my girls when I force them to entertain themselves. I honestly think that it is becoming a lost art. We as a society are so afraid of, or maybe just opposed to, being bored. Boredom brings out such a creative part in kids (and adults) though, that I think they need to experience it.

Today is a perfect example of the benefits of boredom. We are at the tail end of Thanksgiving break and the wind was insane today. So, we decided to take our girls to go see a movie and a late lunch. When we returned home they wanted to turn on cartoons and we told them that they had just watched a movie so they needed to go play. I sat down to work on some school work that I have been putting off all week, and all 3 of them sat down at the table with me and with notebook paper, tape, and colored pencils, they created “books” telling the story of their day. When they finished that, they ran off to their rooms and started an epic princess saga that is still going even 2 hours after they have been told to go to bed. It is amazing what they come up with when they are left to their own devices.

I think that we are the same way. If we could just turn off the noise, imagine what we might come up with! Sabbath rest has been a theme for me lately. Thanksgiving break has been an amazing time of refreshing and recharging for me this year. I know that when I do turn off all the noise, that I can hear from God in a much more real way. I also know that when I take the time to take a break from constantly having to be entertained, I am so much more creative and better able to function during those busy times. As we inch our way to the new year, I want to slow down and quit allowing myself to get so distracted on what my goals and passions are. We need to remember that the presence of God comes as a whisper. You can’t hear a whisper when you are surrounded by noise.”

“The Lord said, ‘Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.’ Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.” 1 King 19:11-13 NIV emphasis added

A Dozen Years Later…

/ bekoepke

I am going to take a moment and brag on my husband for a little while. I blog a lot about my kiddos, motherhood, and faith, but I don’t blog a whole lot about my husband. He really is an amazing man, so I thought it was about time to share a little about him as well as a bit of our backstory.

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Just as a little background, we grew up 19 miles apart. Our lives were intertwined in so many ways, but we never actually met until we were 3 hours and a state away from home in college at the University of Wyoming (Go Pokes!!!). We met for the first time briefly during my Junior year of college. I didn’t cross paths with him again until the next school year when we were reintroduced on the university shotgun team (oh yeah, I don’t know if I ever mentioned how much I love to shoot). I looked forward to each week when we would go shoot, because he often had to buy me a meal afterward when he lost a bet thinking he could out shoot me.

We loved shooting on our university shotgun team!

Fast forward a few months and I awkwardly asked him if he would take me to my sorority formal over email, because I had no other way of contacting him. I wasn’t even sure if he actually checked his emails because at that time email was something you might look at once a week. Much to my surprise, he called me within the hour and said he would go. Being a good guy, he asked me if he could take me out to dinner the night before the formal. I found out much later that he had been half-heartedly dating another girl in my sorority, and when he got my email he immediately broke off that relationship (that may, or may not have caused a bit of drama within the sorority over the next few months).

All dressed up for my sorority formal

From that first date on, we were absolutely inseparable and the best of friends. The thing that I appreciated and respected so much about him was how honest he was, he was never fake with me. He didn’t try to act like someone he wasn’t. He is still that way. Love him or hate him, people cannot argue with the fact that he is one of the most honest people you will ever meet. Six months after we graduated we were engaged, five months after that we were married. We have now been married for about 12 1/2 years. I have learned so much in that time, I thought I would share some of what I have learned so far.

Something that is vital and that has not ever changed, is the foundation of our relationship. Before we even started dating, we had a very long conversation about our faith and our end goals. I made it very clear to him that I was not like most girls, and that at the stage of life we were both in, I wasn’t interested in just dating to date, after all, I was just about to enter my final semester of my senior year of college. We made a priority of our faith and that has been such a blessing over the years. It has been especially important during the difficult times.

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Our Engagement Photo

When the newlywed stage wears off and real life hits, that foundation is paramount. Faith is all you really have when you hit hard times like job layoffs, tight finances, or just simple exhaustion during the throws of raising children. I can’t imagine trying to raise our children together, if our faith was not the same. I also can’t imagine getting through some of the tough times we have been through without our faith. There have been so many times that all we could do was press in and pray together that God would guide our path. I thank God that we are able to do that together. I am also so thankful that finding someone who shared my faith was always a non-negotiable for me, even as a teenager. As I think back, it took a lot of nerve for me, on our first real date, to lay it all out there and tell him exactly where I was in my faith and that I was not willing to date someone I couldn’t share that with. However, I am so glad I did. I never had to be fake with him. I could be, and still can be, exactly who God made me to be without fear of him not appreciating me following my God-given dreams. I pray all three of my girls will find that same kind of foundation in the young men that they choose to marry someday.

Secondary to being on the same page in our faith, flexibility is extremely important. I remember when we first got married and all the “plans” we made. The 1 year, 5 year, and 10 year plans. None of it has happened exactly like we planned, however, we keep dreaming together. Every decision or investment that we have made has been a group effort, but we have had to learn that it is okay for plans to change. Jobs, have changed, living situations have changed, our family has grown, and we have gotten older. One thing that has never changed, regardless of the season of life we are in is that we make flexible goals together.

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My dear husband is now the Principal of a K-12 school, so we still get to go to prom!

As we have gotten older, we have really been able to have fun with that. We no longer make hard goals with strict deadlines that will likely never happen like we planned. Instead, we changed our plans and goals into dreams. We dream together of what can be. We talk about what steps we can take to make those dreams come true. Now, don’t get me wrong, all of our dreams are not exactly the same. He and I both have separate dreams that have yet to come true. But we are able, through the process, to try our best to support each other in the pursuit of our dreams, in hopes that one day soon, those dreams will actually come to fruition.

Humor is the final piece of the puzzle I want to address. I honestly don’t know how anyone can stay married without it. There is something so valuable about being able to laugh together. My husband has always been the funny guy, and I love that. Even when I am fuming mad, he is always able to bring a little humor in to defuse the situation. In his current job as Principal, he has to be able to laugh, or he might just cry when he has to deal with some of the things that comes across his desk. When life gets hard and you are in the middle of the stinking dirty here and now, that isn’t always rainbows and sunshine, you must be able to smile together.

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Always the funny guy, we had a blast representing our team at the national shooting competition!

I don’t want you to think that every moment of every day is a perfect cinderella story. We have our fair share of frustrations, exhausting moments, and struggles. We fight and gripe at each other. We come to points in our more heated discussions ,where we have to just agree to disagree. We are both stubborn, and strong willed. There are definitely clashes of the titans from time to time. Through it all though, those tough times have made us stronger as a couple.

Although it was fun, I would not want to go back to those newlywed days. I love where we are today. I am more comfortable in my own skin that I ever was when I first got married. The scars we have earned through the ups and downs in the last 12 1/2 years of marriage, and 14 years of relationship, have made us who we are today. I use to try so hard to please everyone, only succeeding in making myself miserable and pleasing no one along the way. Now, I realize that if I have to work hard to please people, those people probably don’t really have my best interests at heart. If I have to convince someone to love, appreciate, or be proud of me, their opinion of me really shouldn’t impact how I live my life. Instead, I need to spend more of my energy pleasing God and following his plans for my future, not simply doing what I feel like others expect me to do.

I leave you with the verse we chose for our wedding. I still love this verse today, and think that we could all benefit from living this way.

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:8

Our family sure has grown over the years!