trust

A Matter of Trust

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

The world has gone mad. I have go to be honest, what’s going on before our very eyes feels slightly like the vibe before Y2K mixed with the market crash in 2008…only amplified. Fear has taken hold and the world has gone a bit off the rails. Honestly, it kind of breaks my heart to see how quickly people have become selfish and panicked.

Is selfishness a sin?

No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.

1 Corinthians 10:24 NIV

I was thinking about how many things we take for granted today, and it really humbled me. People are buying every item off a grocery store shelf, when just 2 weeks ago we took for granted how easy it was to get practically anything you wanted or needed at a big box store, or even with the click of a button on your phone app. Now the one item we probably all took for granted the most, toilet paper, has disappeared off the shelves and people have turned into hoarders overnight. I think it would be a great idea to take a deep breath and just think through all the things that we enjoy in this country. Is it inconvenient, absolutely. The uncertainty of what is to come over the next few days, weeks, and months can be a little unnerving if you sit and think about it too much.

One of my favorite verses during stressful times is Matthew 6:25-27 “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?”

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These birds don’t worry about a thing

I love the thought of that. Birds don’t worry, they just live one day at a time.

At our house we have quite a few animals running around. I can attest to the fact that they don’t worry about their future. They focus on right now. Their mode of operation never includes fretting about the upcoming winter or having the latest in ear tag fashion. No, instead they are focused on right now. I think we could learn a lot about a better way to live by observing the creatures around us. Prepare for the seasons ahead of us, but don’t fret about them.

With all this panic about a new virus floating around, and the massive damage it is doing to our economy, it is so easy to get pulled into fear and dread about the future. However, we have to remember: through it all God is still in control. I love the childlike faith of my girls. They don’t panic about the future. They dream of what could be. They talk about how they want to be teachers, singers, or doctors. They play pretend and have no fear of what is going on. They know that their mom and dad are going to take care of them, so they don’t have to worry. We need to be more like that. If God can create us out of nothing and uniquely gift each and every one of us, then nothing is too big for him, not even this virus.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

Not For The Faint Of Heart

/ bekoepke

I remember when I was a newlywed and I would see kids acting up in public or moms frazzled and stressed, I thought to myself that if I had kids it would be different. I mean I had babysat before, how hard could it really be?

Oh boy, have I been humbled.

I absolutely love my girls. They are so smart and seem to learn something new everyday. They never cease to amaze me with their unique personalities and creativity. That being said, this mom gig is the hardest job I have ever had in my life. Every time you start to get confident and feel like you have got this motherhood thing down, something changes.

These last two week have been quite the experience in my world. All of the fun started last Wednesday. My redneck girls love to play outside and are definitely not afraid to get dirty. For several days, these crazy girls had spent hours digging a hole in a dirt pile that we have looking for lizards. Mind you, it is too cold to find lizards, but that did not deter them. Unfortunately, my oldest was focused on her digging game and did not notice her sister was behind her, right in the path of the shovel. As expected, that encounter did not end well. My middle child got a tooth knocked out of place and a small chip off another tooth. Nothing in any parent book can prepare you for something like that!

Not really that big of a deal, you might be thinking to yourself. Lots of kids get teeth knocked out of place or chipped. Inconvenient, yes, earth shattering, no. Well, as Paul Harvey used to say, let me give you the “rest of the story”.

Over the next two days we juggled schedules (not an easy task this time of year) and got her to the dentist just to check everything out. Fortunately she is 5 1/2 years old, so we are probably within 12 months of losing those teeth anyway, so he said just to keep an eye on them, no special treatment (and no expensive dental procedures).

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Crisis averted! Well, for another day anyway. Sadly, the next crisis was only a day away. Saturday was a gorgeous day and we are within days of a good majority of our goats having babies (yay!!!). We worked all day long outside; moving goats, cleaning up, setting up a pen inside for them to kid, and moving cows and our billy goat to different pens. We had a lot to accomplish and got a ton done.

The girls were all outside helping when they could, and playing when they couldn’t. My oldest (once again) was tasked with moving a board and that is when crisis #2 happened. Without her realizing it, my youngest was right behind her and when she stepped back. She knocked both her sister and herself over. That’s when it happened. Head of oldest child hit, you guessed it, youngest child’s head. More specifically, youngest child’s teeth. As a matter of fact, it was the exact same tooth and knocked back in the exact same way as her older sister.

There is no category for something like that. Two children, the same tooth on each, in a 4 day span. Of course, it was on a Saturday so we just had to wait until Monday when I hauled the second child to the dentist for the exact same thing. I would be lying if I told you that I wasn’t afraid of CPS being called on me. However, the dentist laughed and decided to send us to a pediatric dentist because she is a lot younger. So, we wait for a verdict for my youngest child until we go see a specialist (always a cheap prospect).

There is nothing in this world that can prepare you for all the unique challenges of motherhood. You could read every motherhood book ever written and still be completely clueless because kids are not predictable. However, to all the other mommas out there in my same boat, know that you are not alone. We are in this together and will get to the other side.

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My crazy injured-tooth girls

This parenting thing is not for the faint of heart. We need to remember that. Show grace for the other moms out there. We are all doing our best, even if that doesn’t look the same for every person. Give yourself grace, it isn’t easy raising little humans. God is on our side and He is there when it gets stressful and seems impossible.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

John 16:33 NIV

5 Smooth Stones

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment
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I absolutely love David. It doesn’t matter if we are talking about the shepherd boy, entertainer of King Saul, soldier, or King, I just love reading about his progression through both his faith and his life. I would go so far as to say he is one of my spiritual heroes (minus the whole adultery/murder part). God himself found David as a man after His heart.  “But God removed Saul and replaced him with David, a man about whom God said, ‘I have found David son of Jesse, a man after my own heart. He will do everything I want him to do.’” Acts 13:22 (NLT). What an amazing statement. I pray that even through my own mistakes and lapses of judgement, God sees me as someone after His own heart and that will do His will.

I think that as Christians (myself included), we often believe that if we just do what’s right, everything should be smooth sailing. We think that life should be comfortable and easy if we just say and do the right things. The American Christian church is especially guilty of this. We have grown accustomed to ease and comfort, so we feel like we must put on a façade of perfection. Social media only fuels this fire because we can portray ourselves any way we want. What a travesty! No one has a perfect life, nor will we. Honestly, I am thankful that things aren’t perfect because if they were we would miss seeing the blessings through our struggles. 

The very thought of an easy life actually goes completely against the teachings of Jesus himself. He did say “take up your cross and follow me” (see Matthew 16:24-26). That phrase has become somewhat cliché in our modern society. He was literally saying “take up your instrument of extreme torture and death and follow me”.  This wasn’t some cute cross to hang on the wall. He was essentially saying “be ready for a rough ride but I’m right here beside you”.

If you look at the life of David, that is essentially what he did. He believed that God was with him no matter what he was experiencing. He had a bold faith that he was not afraid to share. So many Christians live incognito in this world. We believe in God but don’t want to be perceived as “different”, so we sacrifice some of our beliefs on the altar of fitting in. David didn’t care about that. Even in the darkest moments of his life when he was literally running for his life, he chose to praise God. He was never afraid to go into danger, because he knew God was with him.

I love the story of David and Goliath for many reasons (see 1 Samuel 17). First, I love when God uses unexpected people to advance His kingdom. I also love that He uses unqualified people to achieve incredible victories. David was a teenage shepherd who had never been near a battlefield, much less encountered a soldier with the skills and stature of Goliath. However, he trusted God so much that he chose to go to battle with the only weapon he knew how to use: a slingshot. He passed up using the King’s own armor because it was far too heavy and he wasn’t used to it. Instead, he went and found 5 smooth stones from a stream and went to battle. Here is what I love that I never thought about until this week; David grabbed 5 stones, God gave him the victory with only 1. Wow! Not only was David underqualified, underage, and under skilled, he was also underprepared with only 5 pieces of ammo. However, God gave the victory to a young man with a willing heart and only needed 1 stone to do it. All David had to do was obey. 

So, what is God asking you to do? Even if you feel like David and are underqualified, underage, under skilled, and underprepared, God can use whatever stone you bring to the table. All you have to do is bring it!

As A Gentle Whisper

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

As a teacher of mostly 9th graders, I see every single day how much the creativity of people can be harmed by this instant gratitude, always entertained world we live in. Let’s just be honest, we are all guilty of this from time to time. Almost everyone has an entertainment system that they carry in their pocket, purse, or backpack at all times; the cell phone. Take a look around at practically any waiting room, restaurant, or even stoplight, and you will see grown humans grabbing for that phone and constantly having to be entertained. I am not innocent, and likely you aren’t either.

I have always tried to be careful to not allow too much technology into my girls’ world too soon, but I also don’t want to shelter them so that they don’t know how to use it. As a momma, this can be a very difficult thing to balance. I have never been the mom to just hand off my phone to keep my kids quiet. As a matter of fact, I never have, don’t even have kid’s games loaded on it. On the other hand, my eldest daughter does know how to turn on her cartoons and find movies on our television. It is such a hard balance. We have given in recently to the benefits of apps and websites for reading and math remediation for our girls, and do appreciate the things they are learning. However, when I see kids in my classes texting on smart watches and staring down at the phone “hidden” in their laps, or, like one creative student, in their pencil bag that they can see through to text or snapchat, I want to make sure my kids aren’t addicted to it. I want them to find meaningful real-life relationships. I also want them to find their value in knowing who they are in Christ, not because of social media likes.

I love seeing the imaginations of my girls when I force them to entertain themselves. I honestly think that it is becoming a lost art. We as a society are so afraid of, or maybe just opposed to, being bored. Boredom brings out such a creative part in kids (and adults) though, that I think they need to experience it.

Today is a perfect example of the benefits of boredom. We are at the tail end of Thanksgiving break and the wind was insane today. So, we decided to take our girls to go see a movie and a late lunch. When we returned home they wanted to turn on cartoons and we told them that they had just watched a movie so they needed to go play. I sat down to work on some school work that I have been putting off all week, and all 3 of them sat down at the table with me and with notebook paper, tape, and colored pencils, they created “books” telling the story of their day. When they finished that, they ran off to their rooms and started an epic princess saga that is still going even 2 hours after they have been told to go to bed. It is amazing what they come up with when they are left to their own devices.

I think that we are the same way. If we could just turn off the noise, imagine what we might come up with! Sabbath rest has been a theme for me lately. Thanksgiving break has been an amazing time of refreshing and recharging for me this year. I know that when I do turn off all the noise, that I can hear from God in a much more real way. I also know that when I take the time to take a break from constantly having to be entertained, I am so much more creative and better able to function during those busy times. As we inch our way to the new year, I want to slow down and quit allowing myself to get so distracted on what my goals and passions are. We need to remember that the presence of God comes as a whisper. You can’t hear a whisper when you are surrounded by noise.”

“The Lord said, ‘Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.’ Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.” 1 King 19:11-13 NIV emphasis added

A Dozen Years Later…

/ bekoepke

I am going to take a moment and brag on my husband for a little while. I blog a lot about my kiddos, motherhood, and faith, but I don’t blog a whole lot about my husband. He really is an amazing man, so I thought it was about time to share a little about him as well as a bit of our backstory.

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Just as a little background, we grew up 19 miles apart. Our lives were intertwined in so many ways, but we never actually met until we were 3 hours and a state away from home in college at the University of Wyoming (Go Pokes!!!). We met for the first time briefly during my Junior year of college. I didn’t cross paths with him again until the next school year when we were reintroduced on the university shotgun team (oh yeah, I don’t know if I ever mentioned how much I love to shoot). I looked forward to each week when we would go shoot, because he often had to buy me a meal afterward when he lost a bet thinking he could out shoot me.

We loved shooting on our university shotgun team!

Fast forward a few months and I awkwardly asked him if he would take me to my sorority formal over email, because I had no other way of contacting him. I wasn’t even sure if he actually checked his emails because at that time email was something you might look at once a week. Much to my surprise, he called me within the hour and said he would go. Being a good guy, he asked me if he could take me out to dinner the night before the formal. I found out much later that he had been half-heartedly dating another girl in my sorority, and when he got my email he immediately broke off that relationship (that may, or may not have caused a bit of drama within the sorority over the next few months).

All dressed up for my sorority formal

From that first date on, we were absolutely inseparable and the best of friends. The thing that I appreciated and respected so much about him was how honest he was, he was never fake with me. He didn’t try to act like someone he wasn’t. He is still that way. Love him or hate him, people cannot argue with the fact that he is one of the most honest people you will ever meet. Six months after we graduated we were engaged, five months after that we were married. We have now been married for about 12 1/2 years. I have learned so much in that time, I thought I would share some of what I have learned so far.

Something that is vital and that has not ever changed, is the foundation of our relationship. Before we even started dating, we had a very long conversation about our faith and our end goals. I made it very clear to him that I was not like most girls, and that at the stage of life we were both in, I wasn’t interested in just dating to date, after all, I was just about to enter my final semester of my senior year of college. We made a priority of our faith and that has been such a blessing over the years. It has been especially important during the difficult times.

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Our Engagement Photo

When the newlywed stage wears off and real life hits, that foundation is paramount. Faith is all you really have when you hit hard times like job layoffs, tight finances, or just simple exhaustion during the throws of raising children. I can’t imagine trying to raise our children together, if our faith was not the same. I also can’t imagine getting through some of the tough times we have been through without our faith. There have been so many times that all we could do was press in and pray together that God would guide our path. I thank God that we are able to do that together. I am also so thankful that finding someone who shared my faith was always a non-negotiable for me, even as a teenager. As I think back, it took a lot of nerve for me, on our first real date, to lay it all out there and tell him exactly where I was in my faith and that I was not willing to date someone I couldn’t share that with. However, I am so glad I did. I never had to be fake with him. I could be, and still can be, exactly who God made me to be without fear of him not appreciating me following my God-given dreams. I pray all three of my girls will find that same kind of foundation in the young men that they choose to marry someday.

Secondary to being on the same page in our faith, flexibility is extremely important. I remember when we first got married and all the “plans” we made. The 1 year, 5 year, and 10 year plans. None of it has happened exactly like we planned, however, we keep dreaming together. Every decision or investment that we have made has been a group effort, but we have had to learn that it is okay for plans to change. Jobs, have changed, living situations have changed, our family has grown, and we have gotten older. One thing that has never changed, regardless of the season of life we are in is that we make flexible goals together.

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My dear husband is now the Principal of a K-12 school, so we still get to go to prom!

As we have gotten older, we have really been able to have fun with that. We no longer make hard goals with strict deadlines that will likely never happen like we planned. Instead, we changed our plans and goals into dreams. We dream together of what can be. We talk about what steps we can take to make those dreams come true. Now, don’t get me wrong, all of our dreams are not exactly the same. He and I both have separate dreams that have yet to come true. But we are able, through the process, to try our best to support each other in the pursuit of our dreams, in hopes that one day soon, those dreams will actually come to fruition.

Humor is the final piece of the puzzle I want to address. I honestly don’t know how anyone can stay married without it. There is something so valuable about being able to laugh together. My husband has always been the funny guy, and I love that. Even when I am fuming mad, he is always able to bring a little humor in to defuse the situation. In his current job as Principal, he has to be able to laugh, or he might just cry when he has to deal with some of the things that comes across his desk. When life gets hard and you are in the middle of the stinking dirty here and now, that isn’t always rainbows and sunshine, you must be able to smile together.

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Always the funny guy, we had a blast representing our team at the national shooting competition!

I don’t want you to think that every moment of every day is a perfect cinderella story. We have our fair share of frustrations, exhausting moments, and struggles. We fight and gripe at each other. We come to points in our more heated discussions ,where we have to just agree to disagree. We are both stubborn, and strong willed. There are definitely clashes of the titans from time to time. Through it all though, those tough times have made us stronger as a couple.

Although it was fun, I would not want to go back to those newlywed days. I love where we are today. I am more comfortable in my own skin that I ever was when I first got married. The scars we have earned through the ups and downs in the last 12 1/2 years of marriage, and 14 years of relationship, have made us who we are today. I use to try so hard to please everyone, only succeeding in making myself miserable and pleasing no one along the way. Now, I realize that if I have to work hard to please people, those people probably don’t really have my best interests at heart. If I have to convince someone to love, appreciate, or be proud of me, their opinion of me really shouldn’t impact how I live my life. Instead, I need to spend more of my energy pleasing God and following his plans for my future, not simply doing what I feel like others expect me to do.

I leave you with the verse we chose for our wedding. I still love this verse today, and think that we could all benefit from living this way.

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

1 Peter 4:8

Our family sure has grown over the years!

Paradigm Shift: A Challenge Update

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

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A few days ago, I shared a gratitude challenge (see my blog post Take the Challenge).  I thought I would give a little update on how it is going for me so far.

Soooo, you know the saying “easier said than done”? Yeah, that’s me. It is so easy to talk about putting gratitude into practice on a regular basis. Actually doing it is a completely different thing. Now, don’t get me wrong, I have put some of the things into practice. For example, I did write a few thank you notes, and made a point to thank others for things they had done to help me.

Then Saturday hit.

It’s a funny thing, Saturdays. As a young 20-something newlywed with no kids, I looked forward to my Saturdays. Saturday meant I could sleep in, watch a movie, go on a date, and pretty much do whatever I wanted. Then we had three kids. Sleeping in is a thing of the past because I have kids who like to rise early. Saturdays now mean massive amounts of laundry, dishes, and catching up on housework all while trying to keep kids from making more of a mess or massively slowing me down with all their needs. The gratitude train got a bit derailed on Saturday. Actually, in the spirit of being completely honest, that train hit a cliff and burned completely to the ground. I allowed myself to enter into a pretty negative space mentally. I started internally (and to get real honest, externally too) grumbling and complaining about all that needed to be done. By the end of the day, I was a complete grump and ungrateful to the core. I ended up going to bed pretty early just because I was exhausted. Truth be told, that’s what I really needed anyways, because for about the last 2 weeks, my 3 year old has come in during the middle of the night pretty much every night and I had been a bit sleep deprived because of it.

Now, I didn’t really realize how ungrateful I was being until Sunday morning rolled around. My church participates each year in Operation Christmas Child and my family always packs 3 girl boxes (because I have 3 girls). When I was getting the boxes ready to bring to church, my girls were looking at everything and wanting all of it. My middle child started to really complain and pitched a fit about wanting what was in those boxes. This momma lost her cool. I was appalled at how my kids were acting. I explained to them that these boxes were going to little kids who didn’t get Christmas gifts. I told them that a lot of the kids that receive the boxes are extremely poor and may not even have enough food. I felt like such a failure as a mom because of the entitled way my kids were acting.

That’s when it hit me. I had the conviction come down on me like a flood. I am the one who has taught them to not appreciate what they have. It is little wonder that they grumble when they have to clean up all their toys, when I have been their model. There is little wonder why they don’t appreciate all they have, when I don’t always show that appreciation myself. I have to have a paradigm shift to see that even though I do have lots of laundry and dishes to do, I am blessed to live in a place where I have machines to do the hard work for me. I have to realize that even though my kids make lots of messes, I have healthy, active kids who love to play. I also have to remember that even though I do have a lot of housework to do on the weekends, I have a home and don’t have to worry about where I will sleep each night.

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Learning how to see the pile of laundry as a blessing!

So, I am adding to my challenge after this weekend. I want to model gratitude for my girls. I want to show them what it is like to be thankful. I’m really not sure how I will do it, but I do know that it is so important to me that my girls learn from a young age to be thankful for what they have been given I think I will start by being more thankful to them when they do things to help each other and me.

So my question to you is how do you train up your children to be grateful? I would love some ideas from people who, like me, are in the trenches, as well as those of you who have made it through parenthood and are on the other side.

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:17 NIV

 

Book Review: Take The Day Off

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

I am extremely excited to share this book with you today. God works in mysterious ways, this book is proof of that. Over the last several months, I have really felt like I need to be better about observing a Sabbath day each week. One weekend in particular about a month ago, it was a bit chaotic. We were gone on Saturday, then Sunday rolled around and I ended up having to catch up on everything I missed doing earlier in the weekend; cleaning, dishes, washing a mountain range of laundry. The end of the weekend came and rather than being refreshed and ready for my week, I was frustrated and exhausted. The thought of the next day being Monday and back to the grind, was daunting. My attitude was not the best that week.

Then enter this book.

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The timing of getting this book in the mail could not have been more perfect. Two days after that insane weekend, this showed up in my mailbox (mind you, I didn’t know this one was coming, somehow missed that email). This book has changed my perspective the last couple of weeks.

I am a big Robert Morris fan. Our church just got done doing his teaching on The Blessed Life and I also listen to a podcast of his church (Gateway Church) on an almost weekly basis. I love the way he makes the truths of the Bible extremely practical and applicable. Take The Day Off is no exception to that. This book walks through the need for us to take a day off, not in a vacation sense, although those are good too, but in a Sabbath rest sense. Morris starts by walking through the commandment that we are given by God to take a Sabbath rest (see the 4th commandment in Exodus 20).

I want to encourage every single person who is reading this post to check this book out. This has been an amazing perspective shifting book for me. I have had a pretty stressful school year this year for some reason. It may be the combination of teaching more students that I have ever taught before, more of those students being English Language learners, or possible changes in testing that are causing me stress. Or it could be the fact that my girls are older now and have homework and more things going on at their school that has been wearing me out. It may be a little of all the above, but I know that my Sabbath rest has been out of whack this year. Reading this book has been a game changer for me. I am learning how to get myself more organized to be able to rest. I have learned that in order to truly take a day off, it must be a priority. I have also learned that with God, we can do more in 6 days than we can do without Him in 7.

If you want to pick up your own copy you can enter to win a copy here. If you can’t wait for the results of the giveaway, you order them here. You can also save 25% by entering the code TAKEOFF.

If you ever wondered about all of these book, video, and game reviews that I have done and wanted to possibly do some of your own, now is your chance. One of the companies that I work with is looking for more people to do reviews. You can find out more about the FaithWords Book Club here and join for free.

Take the Challenge

/ bekoepke / 1 Comment

November is often the time of year that people start gearing up for the holidays. Social media often blows up with daily posts of things you are thankful for or countdowns to Thanksgiving or Christmas. It is the time of year that often gets pretty busy. Between school programs, church activities, and family get togethers, we can find ourselves overwhelmed and exhausted. It is also the time of year that things that should bring us joy, often bog us down, cause frustration, or even depression. You find that you can’t please everyone, so your attitude may not be great toward the very people you love enough to try to please.

Maybe this blog post is just for me, however, I have a sneaking suspicion that there are many of you that deal with the same thing I do. There are several of us who find that the magic and joy of the holiday season can sometimes be snuffed out when there are too many things demanded of us. Sure, we love the joy of the holidays and the smiles on our kids’ faces, but we also think about the amount of energy required to clean up that house, shop for the groceries, cook all the needed food, and travel to all the destinations. We also think about the mess after all the fun happens. It can be overwhelming for a busy mom. It can steal our gratitude and joy.

I absolutely don’t have the answers today. Instead, I have a challenge. One of the recurring themes in my current life has been Sabbath rest. I wrote a blog a little while ago dealing with what that means (you can read it here). I have been challenging myself to be better about taking true Sabbath rest. However, I want to add a little bit to that challenge for all of us from now until the New year. Let’s make a goal of focusing on what we are grateful for during that Sabbath time. Maybe that means writing things down, or maybe sending a note to someone. Possibly being grateful could just be making a conscience decision to not complain. Whatever it is, commit to doing that thing for the next month and a half.

There are so many scientific studies that have proven the health benefits of gratitude and positivity. Some of these include better sleep, lower anxiety, increased mood, less feeling of burnout, just to name of few (here is a great article about health benefits). There is also a lot of brain research that shows that when we are grateful, our brain gets a flood of dopamine, that feel good hormone that so many of us nursing moms would experience when we had newborns.

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So, what’s your plan? How are you going to attack this gratitude thing? I think I am going to do a combination of writing down things I am grateful for, along with maybe writing a few well overdue thank you notes. If you have other amazing ideas I would love to hear them! Maybe I will try those out too!

Thank you to everyone who reads these blogs! I pray that the message will be received on fertile soil and that we can all grow in this area together! Let me know what you plan on doing to increase your gratitude.

In every situation [no matter what the circumstances] be thankful and continually give thanks to God; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 Amplified Bible (AMP)

Time For A Break!!!

/ bekoepke / 1 Comment

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We live in a crazy world. Our lives in the United States are lived at a fast pace and sometimes we just can’t keep up. As a mom, I struggle with this. I struggle balancing our fast-paced lives with slowing down enough to enjoy the moments. When I am stressed out I often find it easy to snap at my husband or my kids. I also find it easy to wish that my kids were just a little older, or wish it was a different phase of life. When I find myself doing that, it is an obvious sign that things are out of balance.

I recently heard someone say that marriage teaches you how selfish you are, while having kids teaches you how angry you can be. Such a true statement. Those selfish, angry parts often come out during those stressed out times of life.  When your emotional tank is empty and you are exhausted from a full day of working or keeping a household going, it’s easy to fall into frustration and take that frustration out on the people closest to you.

There has been a theme lately in the teachings I have been listening to and the books I have been reading, about the importance of rest in our lives. Specifically the importance of Sabbath rest. The 4th commandment is the one that addresses the Sabbath:

8 “Remember the Sabbath (seventh) day to keep it holy (set apart, dedicated to God). 9 Six days you shall labor and do all your work, 10 but the seventh day is a Sabbath [a day of rest dedicated] to the Lord your God; on that day you shall not do any work, you or your son, or your daughter, or your male servant, or your female servant, or your livestock or the temporary resident (foreigner) who stays within your [city] gates. 11 For in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea and everything that is in them, and He rested (ceased) on the seventh day. That is why the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy [that is, set it apart for His purposes]. Exodus 20:8-11 Amplified Version.

The ironic thing about the 10 Commandments is that we, as Christians, tend to follow a 90% rule. We have no problem agreeing with the fact that we should not murder or lie or steal our neighbor’s wife. However, when it comes to the whole Sabbath thing, we tend to think that it is an “old covenant” concept and isn’t for today or we simply don’t realize how important it is to God. Do you realize that this commandment is the longest of all ten and goes into the most detail about how exactly to follow it? It is also one of only 4 of the 10 commandments that carried the option of the death penalty if it was violated (the others being murder, adultery, and chronic child rebellion). Now, before I go any further, I want to make it clear that legalism is 100% not the answer. Even Jesus himself rebuked legalism when it comes to the Sabbath (see Mark 2:23-27).

The idea of Sabbath is made for us. It is for our benefit. God saw such importance in the concept of the Sabbath that he started the whole thing at the creation (see Genesis 2). He is God, He didn’t need to rest, but He chose to rest. He chose to pause and just enjoy His creation. The same is true of us. He could have created us not to need rest, however, our bodies require rest. We are not created to operate 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It is incredibly hard to even hear from God if we do not have real rest on a regular basis. I know even in my own life, digging into scripture is exceptionally hard to do when I am physically or mentally exhausted. I’m sure you are probably the same way.

   Sometimes we need to remove ourselves temporarily from the hustle of our lives to re-center ourselves on what is really important. Jesus did it all the time. He spent so much of his time ministering that sometimes he would just remove himself and go off to pray. How many of us do that? For so many of us, even our vacations have an agenda. We feel like we are lazy or wasting time if we don’t have every second of our lives filled. Whether it is our jobs, our kids’ activities, or even things like ministry, we fill every moment. Maybe we all need to step back and just rest. Jesus himself told us to come to him when we are burdened and heavy laden, and he will give us rest (Matthew 11:28-30).

    For God to have put the Sabbath into the 10 commandments, He knew that we desperately needed it. He knew that giving it as a suggestion was not going to work. It had to be a part of His top 10. Sadly, even the Israelites who received these laws after watching Moses on the mountain top had a hard time with this one. For the Israelites, and for us, it often is due to a lack of faith that everything will be okay if we just take a break.

   I am just going to be honest and say that sometimes for me it is a combination of a lack of preparedness or even a lack of proper boundaries. For instance, If I don’t get everything done I wanted to on Saturday, it often flows into Sunday. Or I sometimes find myself doing my school work on a Sunday afternoon or responding to work related emails because I have not established those boundaries in my own life. We feel awkward if we tell someone to not expect a response on a Sunday. 

   Now, back to legalism; I DO NOT think we need to be legalistic about this. If that was the case, I would say that we need to honor the traditional Jewish Sabbath that starts at sundown Friday and ends at sundown Saturday. Honestly I don’t think that the day of the week matters as long as we honor 1 day out of 7. Maybe you have a job where you do work on Sunday but have days off at other points of the week. Have a Tuesday Sabbath! We live under grace, but I do believe that the closer we are following what God has ordained, the more of a full life we will live.

I hope that this coming week you will have the opportunity to take a true Sabbath and really enjoy the blessing of a day of rest!

20-20 Vision Through the Rearview Mirror

/ bekoepke / Leave a comment

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The end of August marked 10 full years since I had a major course correction in my life. Looking back now, it seems like an eternity ago. But in that moment, it was the most terrifying thing I had endured up until that point in my life. That moment was when I was laid off from a job I really enjoyed because the company was closing my location.

The whirlwind of emotions I experienced at that time were absolutely overwhelming. The most prevalent, of course, being fear. Fear of my immediate future, fear of the unknown, fear of failure. What was I going to do? Where would I work? What were my husband and my finances going to look like? We had only been married for 2 years at that time, and for a young 20 something who thought she had her life figured out, the thoughts of starting over can be a scary thing.

God is really amazing in the ways that he prepared us for this transition. I found out several months earlier that this was going to happen. At that time, I was even given the opportunity to stay with the company, if I was willing to move. However, we really did not want to move, so I took the option of being laid off. Because of the amount time we had between when I was informed it was going to happen, and when it actually happened, we were able to get some preparations made, mainly with our finances. We were able to make it so that we could live off of 1 paycheck (my husband’s teacher/coach wages) and my severance pay for a short while while I searched for another job.

Although I did have a little bit of notice, nothing could fully prepare me for the flood of emotions I would experience during that time. A sense of loss and, at times, depression, overtook me. The job I lost was one I planned on staying in for the long haul. I truly had to mourn the death of a dream. I also had to dig in deep to find a way to trust God through the process. It wasn’t easy, but that time frame in my life has forever marked me and has made me the person I am today.

Things are often a little more clear when you look back than when you are looking forward. So, what advice could I possibly share 10 years later? Well, it’s advice I still have to remind myself of over and over again; Trust God through the process. It’s easy to trust, in theory, but when you are in the midst of uncertainty, it’s a bit tougher. Even now, I struggle with that. I struggle with change when I’m comfortable, and struggle with waiting for a change when it is something I desire. It can be a double edged sword. One thing that I always hold onto is that God has a plan, whether or not we always see it. And it is a good plan.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6