Who are you, really?

I wrote this a few years ago but thought it was worth sharing again!

                It’s that time of year again, high school and college graduations are going on nearly every weekend in May and into June. This time of year, I always think back to when I was about to graduate from high school and college, and how smart I was back then. Of course, I say that sarcastically, because looking back now I see how little I knew about life. It’s so easy in your teens, and early twenties to be so sure of your life’s path. We build our identities so much on what we do, who we know, and even what kind of clothes we wear or vehicle we drive.  However, none of those things are eternal. Jobs change, in both expected and unexpected ways, friendships definitely change, and material things go in and out of style and eventually end up worn out and tossed aside.

               So, who are you, really? If all the fancy clothes, “cool” friends, money, and talents were suddenly stripped away from you, what. would remain? Are you a person that does whatever it takes to fit in or be admired? Or perhaps are you willing to go into tremendous amounts of debt just to look the part of someone wealthy? Or maybe you are willing to compromise and “fudge” your beliefs a little at work or school because you don’t want to be called a prude? On the other hand, maybe you have a firm set of beliefs and are unwilling to compromise on those just to fit in with the world?

                Those are hard things to think about, because we have such an attachment to status. I know that when I first graduated college, my identity revolved so much around what I did that when I suddenly found out that my location was closing and I was being laid off, I was crushed. It was at that point that I really had to start figuring out who I was, beyond what I did or who I knew. I had to go back to Genesis and realize that I was formed in the very image of God and regardless of who I was or what I did to earn a living. I also had to remember that God had a plan for my life and He wasn’t surprised in the least about the fact that I was being laid off. “I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah 1:5 NLT.                At that point, my sincere hearts’ desire turned toward walking the path God Himself had laid out for me. I started praying more than I ever had before. I chose to put my focus on one thing: the approval of God Himself. That isn’t an easy task. In the materialistic world we live in, if you don’t run with the right crowd or have the fanciest house on the block, you can sometimes be looked down upon. Although having nice things is not a bad thing, letting those things own us is. It can also be challenging when you are not willing to bend on your morals, I have especially seen this as a teacher when kids are not use to being held to a high standard. It can be lonely at times when it feels like everyone else is just going along with the world. Whatever we do though, we need to focus on doing it as a witness of the gospel. “Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive his approval. Be a good worker, one who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15 NLT. Whether you are a doctor or a garbage collector, that doesn’t really matter. Each one of us has a great commission from Christ to make disciples of ALL nations (See Matthew 28). We need to have an eternal focus in whatever it is we do for a living. We must have integrity, generosity, love, and honesty no matter what we do for a living. We also must be willing to stick to our morals and beliefs no matter who is trying to convince us to bend “just this once”.  I know that I have fallen short in so many of those areas. However, I pray constantly for God to use me to reach others.
                I pray for all my former students, friends, and relatives who are graduating that your focus would not be on the status of what you do, the money, how much stuff you have, or what others think of you. Rather, I pray that you would work every single day as if God Himself was your ultimate boss (Hint: ultimately, He is). Don’t become a fake person who changes depending on the people they are with. Be the person who, when others are going through a hard time and need a true and honest friend, they seek you out. Congratulations and best wishes to all of you! I can’t wait to see where your life’s journey will take you!

Don’t Create An Ishmael While You Wait On Your Isaac

I am an extremely impatient person, as many of you may be.  I remember a particular Christmas as a kid when I actually tiptoed out of my room with a flashlight before dawn just to see what Santa had brought, then went back to bed and pretended to be surprised in the morning when I could finally get up (sorry mom).  I hate having to wait on things, especially if it is something I really want.
Over the years, I have really had to learn how to be patient.  One of the many areas I have had to learn the lesson of patience, has been in my finances.  When I first got married I knew nothing other than simply throwing things on a credit card or loan.  In my first few months of marriage in the process of building a home, my husband and I acquired one of the things many married couples do: debt.  We wound up with the Home Depot Card, Furniture Row Card, and a few other cards and debts.  Of course, we could have saved a little money by buying used, but hey we were married now so we deserved to buy new; regardless of whether we could afford the “things” or not.  Thank goodness, about 9 months after we were married, we wound up going through Financial Peace University (a class that teaches about finances from a Biblical perspective by Dave Ramsey) through our small group at church.  This course opened our eyes to see how important getting and staying out of debt was, and really revolutionized our thought process when it came to money.  We have had to make some tough decisions in order to not go back into the debt we use to live under.  It has not always been easy, but has always been worth it.
If you know the story of Abraham in the Bible, you know that there was a little bit of dysfunction in his life.  God had promised him a son, but time was ticking away and still he had no son.  His wife decided that since she couldn’t have a son that they could “rig it” and he could have a son through her servant Hagar (what wife in her right mind would do that???).  It worked, Hagar became pregnant and had a son she named Ishmael.  However, that was not he son God had promised.  Abraham and Sarah had jumped the gun and ended up with less than God’s best for them. One of my favorite things about this story is the fact that even though Abraham and Sarah had royally messed up (and we still feel the affects of this mess up all these years later, just look at the middle east), God continued to hold up his end of the promise.  The real blessing was Isaac who would be born from Sarah 14 years later. “The Lord kept his word and did for Sarah exactly what he had promised. She became pregnant, and she gave birth to a son for Abraham in his old age. This happened at just the time God had said it would.” Genesis 21:1-2 NLT.
So many of us create our own Ishmael in the process of waiting on our Isaac.  It is so hard to wait, especially if things look impossible.  Things looked impossible for Abraham.  After all, he was 86 when Ishmael came along and 100 when Isaac finally arrived.  Talk about a long wait!  I honestly don’t blame them for trying their own way to make things happen.  However, had they simply waited and trusted in God, they could have avoided a lot of heartache.
So what is your Ishmael?  Have you entered into a bad relationship simply because you didn’t want to wait on who God has for you?  Or have you gotten yourself into insane amounts of debt because you didn’t want to wait and save up?  Or maybe you tried to force God’s hand on another thing you feel you have been promised and have made a mess of it.  Whatever your Ishmael, remember that God is true to his promises.  He has an Isaac in store if we can simply wait on His timing.